


From Dusk till Dawn

by AAvery



Series: Hyuk/Leo oneshots & stories [5]
Category: VIXX
Genre: It has a Happy Ending Though, M/M, Paranormal AU, Reincarnation AU, Sorry not sorry for this, alternative universe, multi-chaptered
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-13
Updated: 2018-06-10
Packaged: 2018-11-13 14:19:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 23,855
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11186892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AAvery/pseuds/AAvery
Summary: “Y-you…” Taekwoon started to stutter out. “Y-you’re a… a…”“A ghost?” The boy finished. Taekwoon nodded.“Yeah, I am. My name’s Hyuk, though, in case you wanted to know.”“B-but you’re just a kid.”“I’m eighteen actually but yeah, that’s because I died young.” The boy, Hyuk, looked embarrassed. Taekwoon couldn’t imagine why.“D-died!?”“Don’t pass out on me again.” Hyuk scolded. Taekwoon took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down.“Okay, I’m okay. I’m just talking to the friendly ghost that I always kind of knew was there. This is fine. I’m fine.”“You sound like you’re freaking out.”“Do I? I don’t think I’m freaking out. What’s there to freak out about? I’m fine. This is fine.”“I can just leave…”





	1. Taekwoon

**Author's Note:**

> Because there needs to be more Luck on this website. One story at a time.

Taekwoon had always lived a pretty normal life… well as normal of a life as he could with renowned dancer, Cha Hakyeon, as his mother.

Hakyeon wasn't Taekwoon’s real mother, obviously, but he may as well have been since he was the only mother either Taekwoon or his adoptive brother, Jaehwan had known. They had been adopted at a young age: Taekwoon at eight and Jaehwan at six.

When Hakyeon retired from the stage at twenty seven, he decided to peruse his dream of starting a family. He’d had a good career and loved to dance but his years performing left him lonely and longing for a family. So, he took his manager-turned-personal-assistant-who-was-totally-not-his-husband Hongbin, adopted two children, opened a dance studio in a small town, and settled down.

It was a pretty normal life for Taekwoon, so what if he had two dads?

That wasn't the strange part, anyway.

Dance lessons were non-negotiable but Taekwoon didn't mind those; even if he and Jaehwan were almost always the only boys in the classes. Still, Hakyeon cried every time they went to perform on stage like all the other mothers and Hongbin beamed with pride like all the other fathers.

Even when they branched out to other activities, Hakyeon and Hongbin were always there like all the other parents. They cheered and heckled a bit too loudly at all of Taekwoon’s soccer games, basketball games, and swim meets. They went all out in supporting Jaehwan’s choir concerts, plays and musicals, as well. Just like all the other parents.

When Jaehwan met his boyfriend, Wonsik- one of the only other males to take lessons at Hakyeon’s studio- and they hit it off instantly, Hakyeon and Hongbin sat both their sons down and gave them “the talk” just like any other parents.

They were supportive through both of their sons coming out as gay as well, just like most other parents.

When Wonsik was kicked from his own house for being gay and needed a place to stay, Hakyeon practically adopted him into the family. After that, Wonsik just kind of stayed and their family of four became five.

So what if two of the ‘children’ were dating each other?

That wasn't the strange part anyway.

They lived like any other family in a small house in a neighborhood full of other families. Their house had three bedrooms- one for each of them.

In the early years, Hongbin had lived elsewhere, only showing up when his job demanded. But soon he moved to their living room couch out of nothing more than the simplicity of it. And when a seven year old Jaehwan had asked why daddy didn’t sleep in the same room as mommy like all his friends’ families, Hongbin moved into Hakyeon’s bedroom and officially became part of the family. It had secretly made both Hakyeon and Hongbin incredibly happy but neither would admit it.

Hongbin and Hakyeon weren’t married and that was a little strange but that didn’t make them any less ‘mom and dad’ in Taekwoon and Jaehwan’s eyes. Hakyeon would always say it was because he wanted to show his children they didn’t need a man to be happy and to show them to be strong independent people. Hongbin would always say it was because they didn’t need something like marriage vows or labels to keep them together. The two never said it but their children could see how much their parents actually adored each other.

When Wonsik came into their lives, he moved in directly to Jaehwan’s room. And, in a stark contrast to Hongbin and Hakyeon, Wonsik and Jaehwan professed their love for each other annoyingly often. Hakyeon found it cute. Hongbin would turn away, pretending he didn’t see it. Taekwoon found it disgusting and let them know every time.

After Jaehwan got a boyfriend, Hakyeon turned his attention to Taekwoon a lot more, pressuring him to get a boyfriend too. Taekwoon ignored it most of the time, but occasionally he’d just feel a little upset his younger brother could find someone so easily while he couldn’t.

But besides all that, they really were like any other family.

Hakyeon cooked. Hongbin cleaned. Both of them worked full time to support the family. Taekwoon and Jaehwan were in charge of keeping their rooms clean and doing their laundry. When everyone got tired of Hakyeon’s subpar cooking, Taekwoon took over that job. Wonsik would help wherever he could in thanks to his ‘parents’ and everything was just like any other family.

Maybe this was only normal because Taekwoon didn’t know any other family but he didn’t care. This was his family and as far as he was concerned, it was like every other family.

Except for one thing.

The one thing that made Taekwoon’s life a little less than normal.

He was convinced his house was haunted.

It took ten years to fully convince Taekwoon of this fact but he knew it for certain now. Even if he only had speculation as his evidence.

His first clue was when he was ten and Jaehwan, eight. Him and Jaehwan were getting ready one morning, both of them in the bathroom. Jaehwan was brushing his hair and Taekwoon, his teeth.

“Jaehwannie! Make sure you brush your teeth! You too, Taekwoon!” Hakyeon called from the kitchen.

“Okay!” Jaehwan shouted back for the both of them. Hakyeon always thought it was funny how his children were perfect opposites. Jaehwan often answered for the both of them since he was loud enough for the both of them.

Jaehwan finished his hair as Taekwoon finished his teeth. He was just about to leave to finish gathering his schoolwork when Jaehwan asked:

“Have you seen my toothbrush?”

The eight year old was checking on the floor so that’s how Taekwoon knew it was serious. He helped his brother look for a moment before they both gave up.

“Don’t tell Umma I didn’t brush my teeth,” Jaehwan said as he stood up. Taekwoon nodded in a silent promise but it was short lived and unnecessary. Just as Jaehwan was about to exit the room, his One Piece themed toothbrush came flying across the bathroom to whack him in the back of the head.

He turned around slowly, a look of shock on his face to match Taekwoon’s.

“You didn’t throw that, did you?” Jaehwan asked barely above a whisper. Taekwoon shook his head ‘no’. Jaehwan slowly picked up the flying toothbrush, small hand visibly shaking.

“Umma! Appa!” Jaehwan ran shouting from the bathroom. “My toothbrush is haunted!”

Taekwoon had thought bigger, though. Especially when other things that had been proclaimed ‘lost’ suddenly appeared around the house. Thankfully, none of it was thrown at them again but it didn’t make the sudden appearance less strange.

Taekwoon would spend what felt like hours searching the house for something to then go back to his room in defeat and find the item sitting on his bed. Scenarios like that happened entirely too often throughout his ten years of living in Hakyeon’s house to consider them just ‘coincidences’. Taekwoon decided that the ghost was a helpful one- no one ever said they all had to be evil.

However, Jaehwan still ran out of the bathroom screaming that his toothbrush was haunted every now and again so it was also a pretty mischievous ghost.

The second strange occurrence happened when Taekwoon was fourteen and Jaehwan twelve. Taekwoon had just joined his high school’s junior varsity soccer team… and with that came Saturday boot camps. He had to spend practically his entire Saturday practicing out in the hot summer sun. Unfortunately for him, Saturdays were also the days he was expected to clean his room and do his laundry and it was his turn to clean his and Jaehwan’s shared bathroom. So even when he got home, completely exhausted and wanting nothing else but to sleep, he would have to clean instead. He berated himself for not having the sense to do his chores the day before as he got home late at night. Cursed his existence as he trudged up to his room.

But as he turned the light on, he realized something was amiss- as in, nothing was amiss. His room was clean. No clothes on the floor. No scattered papers and textbooks. His bed was made up and ready for him to just fall into it, pull the covers up and go to bed. His first thought was that maybe Hakyeon or Hongbin had taken pity on him and cleaned his room for him but then he found all his laundry done as well. It was all hanging neatly in his closet or folded perfectly in his dresser. The bathroom was spotless, too.

But what really put his parents out of the options of who could have done it was when Hakyeon had come to investigate his cleaning job in the bathroom the next day and Hongbin checked his room.

“Good job getting all that done, Woonie!” Hakyeon praised.

“Nice work, kiddo.” Hongbin patted his head.

So if his parents didn’t help him out, his only other option was Jaehwan. But that too was put to rest when Jaehwan was scolded for not getting any of his chores done. And if Jaehwan didn’t even do his own chores, there was no way he did Taekwoon’s.

So Taekwoon assumed the ghost that they shared residence with was a helpful grandma ghost. One that had taken a specific liking to Taekwoon for some unknown reason.

From that point on, Taekwoon found that a lot of his chores just finished themselves. He had absolutely no memory of ever doing them and when he asked everyone if they’d done it for him, the answer was always no.

Taekwoon found himself coming home from school or practices to a made up and welcoming bed that he _knew_ he hadn’t put that way in the morning. But usually he was too tired to properly care. He’d just whisper a grateful “thank you” to anything that was or was not listening and then he’d collapse happily into his inexplicably warm bed and immediately fall asleep.

When Taekwoon turned sixteen, the helpful grandma ghost became much more active. He woke up on his birthday to find Hakyeon in the kitchen arranging a bouquet of vibrant lilies in a vase.

“Oh you’re up! Happy Birthday, Woonie!” Hakyeon cooed upon seeing Taekwoon paddle into the kitchen.

“What’re the flowers for?” Taekwoon asked, situating himself on the counter next to the vase.

“I found them this morning. They were addressed to you but didn’t have the sender’s name. Guess you’ve got a secret admirer wishing you a happy birthday!”

“No idea who, though.”

That had been a lie. He had an idea but he couldn’t exactly tell Hakyeon that he had a helpful- and thoughtful- ghost grandma on his side. It was just a thought, though.

But that thought soon turned into certainty when Taekwoon started finding flowers all over the place. It had started only during holidays and special occasions, he’d find a few beautiful flowers on his desk but by the time he was seventeen, he’d get a singular flower almost every day. Finding them always brightened his day… he only wished he could find a way to return the favor to his thoughtful, helpful, ghost grandma.

When Taekwoon turned eighteen, he started finding already made and steaming hot coffee waiting for him along with his flower every morning. How the spirit knew exactly how Taekwoon liked his morning latte was beyond him but he didn’t fret too much.

He worried that he depended a bit too much on his friendly ghost. From his chores to his coffee, it really did a lot for him. It occurred to him on more than one occasion that all of this really could just be in his head. His growing loneliness conjuring up imagined scenarios since everyone else in life had a significant other. But that option was a little strange to think about considering he dubbed the ghost: thoughtful, helpful grandma ghost.

But what finally sealed the deal. What finally convinced Taekwoon that his house was in fact haunted and he wasn’t just crazy, was seeing the spirit for the first time.

It was one of those mornings where he so unfortunately woke up five minutes before his alarm clock… except this time, when he could think around all the sleepiness he still felt, he found he wasn’t alone.

Sitting crossed legged on the foot of his bed, watching him with a curious expression, was a boy.

Taekwoon immediately sat up in his bed, pushing himself as far against the headboard as he could go. The boy- apparently Taekwoon’s ghost- looked just like any other human. He was tall and skinny, something Taekwoon noticed when the spirit stood up in alarm. His skin was pale, maybe a bit paler than what was considered normal but nothing too out of the ordinary. He had blond hair, almost white, that hung in his eyes. His eyes were what made him different, though. They were a deep red, the color of blood.

As Taekwoon panicked at the sight of the ghost, so did the spirit. His red eyes wide with fear at being caught as he jumped off the bed.

“W-who’re you?” Taekwoon managed to stutter out.

The spirit didn’t say anything, instead it vanished into thin air just as Taekwoon’s alarm clock started going off.

When Taekwoon’s heart finally calmed back down to a workable pace, he realized what he had just seen.

Guess his ghost was actually a thoughtful, helpful teenage ghost… that really changed this whole situation. Because honestly, if the ghost was actually a teenaged boy, one that looked to be Taekwoon’s age at that, why in the world was he helping Taekwoon out so much? He and Jaehwan hardly ever did their chores unless they were yelled at to do so. So why would a ghost, one that had absolutely no obligation to help Taekwoon out at all, help him?

Regardless of all that, Taekwoon pushed the incident as far out of his mind as he could, brushing it off as nothing more than a crazy dream or a wild hallucination.

It took four days to really forget about the appearance of the ghost… just long enough for it to make another appearance.

Taekwoon had come home early from school, sent home more like it, since he was running a high fever. He had to walk home, though, since neither of his parents could get off work to pick him up. It took a lot to convince the school nurse to let him just walk home but he did. He wasn’t really feeling all that terrible anyway.

That turned out to be a horrible mistake.

The longer he walked, the more miserable he felt and when he finally got home he felt like death was about ready to take him away. His only solace was that his ghostly friend would probably have his bed ready and waiting for him by the time he crawled his way to his room.

He dumped his bag on the kitchen floor and kicked his shoes off, uncaring of where everything landed Then he- quite literally- crawled his way to his bedroom. He was too weak to walk so when he reached his bedroom door, he braced himself against the frame to stand… but what he saw there made him nearly forget how awful he was feeling.

The same boy he had seen at the foot of his bed was there, wearing the same black clothes from the first morning. He was walking around Taekwoon’s room, singing quietly to himself as he phased around the room. It looked like he were cleaning to Taekwoon; every time he picked something up, he’d materialize and then he’d vanish again when he put it down.

Taekwoon yelped in surprise, fumbling to turn on the light switch and hopefully stop whatever hallucination he was having. But turning the light on did nothing. The ghost boy still stood there, looking just as surprised and scared as Taekwoon felt. The ghost didn’t stay there long, though. He looked around frantically before disappearing from sight.

“W-wait!” Taekwoon called out; he had to find out if the ghost was real or just a part of a fever dream. “Don’t go…”

The ghost reappeared, hiding crouched under Taekwoon’s desk. Taekwoon would’ve laughed at the sight of a giant of a boy hiding under a small desk if he wasn’t terrified.

The boy came out, standing up and looking at Taekwoon apprehensively before walking closer.

“Y-you’re real?” Taekwoon asked.

The ghost nodded slowly.

And with the combination of his high fever and the complete shock of seeing a real ghost, Taekwoon fainted. Vision going black with the last thing he saw being extremely worried red eyes.

That was also first thing he saw when he finally came around, too.

The ghost’s face hovered above him, eyebrows knotted with worry and concern written all over his face.

“Oh thank god you’re okay! You had me so worried,” an unfamiliar deep voice said upon Taekwoon’s awakening. Taekwoon sat up slowly, a wet towel falling off his forehead. A gentle- and surprisingly warm- hand came to feel at his forehead it its place.

“I think you’ll be okay,” the boy said, taking the towel from Taekwoon’s lap and placing it in a bowl next to the bed.

“Y-you…” Taekwoon started to stutter out. “Y-you’re a… a…”

“A ghost?” The boy finished. Taekwoon nodded.

“Yeah, I am. My name’s Hyuk, though, in case you wanted to know.”

“B-but you’re just a kid.”

“I’m eighteen actually but yeah, that’s because I died young.” The boy, Hyuk, looked embarrassed. Taekwoon couldn’t imagine why.

“D-died!?”

“Don’t pass out on me again.” Hyuk scolded. Taekwoon took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down.

“Okay, I’m okay. I’m just talking to the friendly ghost that I always kind of knew was there. This is fine. I’m fine.”

“You sound like you’re freaking out.”

“Do I? I don’t think I’m freaking out. What’s there to freak out about? I’m fine. This is fine.”

“I can just leave…”

“NO!”

Hyuk looked taken aback by Taekwoon’s outburst, unnatural red eyes wide with shock.

“I mean, no you don’t have to hide anymore.”

“Really?” He looked so hopeful. Taekwoon practically forgot he was dealing with an undead spirit and not just some cute neighborhood friend.

“Y-yeah… you’re not going to like attack me or anything, right?”

“What?” The ghost looked offended. “I could never! I…”

He suddenly cut himself off, cheeks dusting a light pink. Taekwoon didn’t know ghosts were still capable of doing that.

“You…?”

“I’ve watched you grow up… I could never hurt you.”

Well that answered one of Taekwoon’s questions. The helpful ghost he grew up with really had been a teenage boy and not some nice old grandmother.

“So you’ve been here since we moved in?”

“I’ve been here for around twenty years now.”

Taekwoon couldn’t explain the sadness he felt at that statement. How lonely.

“Don’t look so upset… it’s not your fault.”

Taekwoon nodded before asking: “Everything that’s happened then… was that you?”

“Define everything…”

“Lost things suddenly appearing?”

“Yep, I’m pretty good at finding things. I literally know this house inside and out.”

“My chores?”

“I have a lot of free time.”

“Jaehwan’s ‘haunted’ toothbrush?”

“The first time was an accident but now it’s just plain funny.”

“The flowers? My coffee?”

“I’m a bit of a hopeless romantic.”

“W-what?” Taekwoon felt his face heat up… this time he knew it didn’t have anything to do with his fever.

“Did I say that out loud?”

Taekwoon nodded.

“Oh well, I guess I should mention that I kind of sort of maybe just a little bit fell in love with you over the years.”

That didn’t compute in Taekwoon’s head. A ghost. One that knew every little thing about Taekwoon. That had seen him at his worst just as many times as at his best. A GHOST. Was in love with him? What sense did that honestly make?

“So the flowers…”

“Were the only way I could think to let you know someone was thinking about you without being creepy…”

“And sitting at the foot of my bed watching me sleep isn’t creepy?”

“That was a onetime thing! I promise!”

Taekwoon laughed but immediately felt a pang of pain in his head. Grabbing it with a wince, Hyuk looked at him with that terribly worried expression.

“I almost forgot… you’re running a one hundred and two fever, you need to lay down.”  

Hyuk’s gentle hands carefully pushed his shoulders down so that he was lying down once more. He wrung out the towel in the bowl before placing it on Taekwoon’s forehead once more.

“How do you know that?” Taekwoon asked, his voice coming out as only a whisper.

“After you uh… fainted at the sight of me…”

“Sorry.”

“No don’t apologize, it was my own fault. But after you fainted I kind of had a panic attack myself. But I got you into bed and then realized how warm you felt… I’ve been taking care of you since then.”

“How long was I out?”

“About an hour… I was so scared you had…. That you might actually… yeah.” Hyuk couldn’t finish the sentence. Guess even as a ghost, thinking of death was hard for him. Taekwoon didn’t blame him.  

“You carried me into bed?” Taekwoon changed the subject to get rid of that sad expression on Hyuk’s face.

“Well yeah, how else would you have gotten here?”

“You can touch things?”

“Dude, have you not been paying attention?” Hyuk asked with a laugh, pushing a few strands of hair out of Taekwoon’s eyes for emphasis.

“Why do you feel so warm?”

“I dunno.” Hyuk shrugged. “I may be dead but I’m still a human. Well, the remnants of a human anyway.”

“Oh.” Taekwoon felt his eyes slipping shut again but he still had so many questions.

“You should rest…” Hyuk said, as if reading his mind. He pulled the blankets up around Taekwoon’s shivering body. He was beginning to feel unbelievably cold again and couldn’t help leaning in to the warm hand that brushed his hair out of his face.

“You won’t disappear will you?”

“I don’t have any intention of leaving, I’ll still be here when you wake up.”

“Okay…”

And then Taekwoon’s eyes finally slipped closed.

When Taekwoon did finally wake up, it wasn’t to gentle hands and worried red eyes. It was to Hakyeon coming home and immediately shouting for a sign of life from Taekwoon.

He couldn’t exactly shout back so Hakyeon came running up the stairs and into Taekwoon’s bedroom all sorts of freaked out.

As his mother rushed into the room in a flurry of worried ramblings, Taekwoon noticed just where his new ghostly friend had been hiding. He was perched precariously on top of Taekwoon’s dresser, holding a bowl of something that looked steaming hot. Hyuk caught his eyes and held a finger to his lips. As if Taekwoon would actually tell Hakyeon there was a ghost sitting on top of his wardrobe… that in itself was something he even found hard to believe.

“Oh Woonie! Are you feeling any better?” Hakyeon asked, immediately feeling Taekwoon’s forehead. “You didn’t sound so bad on the phone this morning but you look terrible.”

He tried to speak but nothing but a hoarse croak came out; guess that was answer enough for Hakyeon. He was met with two equally worried expressions.

“Oh I’m sorry, Woonie! Do you need me to get you anything?” He asked, helping Taekwoon sit up and propping him up with pillows.

Taekwoon looked to Hyuk who held up the bowl he was holding and mocked eating its contents, he then looked to his side where he found a glass of water and cold medication already waiting for him. It looked like he was already in capable hands.

So Taekwoon shook his head no to answer Hakyeon’s question.

“Okay.” Hakyeon smiled at him before placing a kiss on his forehead. “If you need anything just text Jaehwan to yell for me.”

Taekwoon nodded in understanding and then Hakyeon left, closing the door so that Taekwoon might have some semblance of peace and quiet.

“He’s home early today,” Hyuk said after he was certain Hakyeon wasn’t coming back, jumping down from his perch on the dresser.

“I’m sorry,” Taekwoon forced out.

“Hush, it’s not that big of a deal. He can’t see me, anyway.”

Hyuk handed Taekwoon the bowl of what he found to be steaming hot ramen as he sat down on the bed, facing Taekwoon.

“Why can I see you then?”

Hyuk winced at the sound of Taekwoon’s hoarse voice.

“I’ll explain everything and answer all your questions but first…”

Hyuk handed Taekwoon two small, orange pills.

“You need to take these.”

Taekwoon nodded and tossed the pills in his mouth before downing the glass of water Hyuk then handed him. He winced at the feeling of the cold liquid on his sore throat.

“Now eat, you haven’t had anything all day.”

“How do you know that?”

“You never eat breakfast, you came home before lunch time and then slept through both lunch and dinner so…”

“Fine.” Taekwoon rolled his eyes before beginning to eat as instructed. He was starting to get the feeling Hyuk really was some sort of grandmother with the way he naturally took care of him. Just a really cute, teenaged grandmother ghost.

“Now why can I see you?”

“Only people I want to see me can.”

“Then what about earlier this week?”

“I lost focus…” Hyuk was blushing.

“What about today?”

“I wasn’t focusing…”

“You’re a reliable one.”

“Wow.” Hyuk laughed, mocking heartache. “Maybe I should just stop helping you out.”

Taekwoon quickly shook his head.

“No?”

“I…” Taekwoon had to express his gratitude even if it was super embarrassing. His face felt hot and he figured only part of it was because of his fever. “I depend on you a lot.”

“Really?”

“Yeah…”

“Well, I’m glad my petty attempts at romance have had some affect.”

“Don’t say things like that.” Taekwoon reached out to lightly hit Hyuk on the shoulder. He was surprised to find that his hand did actually connect with warm flesh… or at least what felt like warm skin.

“Okay, okay I’m sorry.” Hyuk laughed. “Any other questions?”

Taekwoon had a ton of questions he wanted answered and as the days went by only more seemed to pop up.

“How did you learn you could control who sees you?” Taekwoon had asked one late night a few days after he got over his cold. Taekwoon had been half-heartedly typing up an essay due the next day. It was hard to focus, though, with Hyuk phasing around the room as he cleaned and sang some silly jingle that always played off the TV. Every time he disappeared his song would fade away as well, but the song would come back in full force as he reappeared again.

Distracting was an understatement.

“What do you mean?” Hyuk asked, phasing back into reality so that he was sitting next to Taekwoon on the bed. Taekwoon closed his laptop, he'd just finish the essay tomorrow morning.

“Like how did you figure out that you could show yourself to me but stay hidden from everyone else?”

“Oh… that’s actually a really good question…” Hyuk said, thoughtfully. “How to explain… I guess I just woke up knowing how to. Like you know how you’re born knowing how to breathe?”

“Yeah…”

“I just kinda know how to do it… I can’t really explain it any other way.”

“Oh okay… so wh-“ His next question was cut off by Jaehwan bursting though his door.

“Taekwoon! Who are you talking to?” He shouted.

Taekwoon noticed Hyuk had disappeared from sight again, but Taekwoon could still fell his weight next to him on the bed.

“No one,” Taekwoon answered. He felt a finger begin to poke at his side and jumped at the contact. He heard a small chuckle before Taekwoon felt Hyuk poke him again. This ghost…

“But I heard voices.” Jaehwan looked at Taekwoon skeptically as he tried to casually grab Hyuk’s invisible hand that continued to attack his side.

“I was watching a video, maybe you heard that.”

“Yeah probably. Anyway, Umma and Appa went to bed so keep your videos on low volume.”

“Okay, thanks.”

Then Jaehwan was gone and Hyuk reappeared, laughing hilariously.

“You are the devil’s incarnate.” Taekwoon swatted at the ghost’s arm.

“Oh come on, I’ve gotta have fun somehow.”

“Yeah whatever.”

“Okay, okay. I’m sorry...” Hyuk looked guiltily over at Taekwoon. “What other question did you have?”

Taekwoon knew Hyuk was just trying to change the subject and it frustrated him how good the ghost was at doing that.

“Can you like… walk through walls and stuff?”

Hyuk gave him a look that just screamed: “Are you serious?”

“What kind of ghost would I be if I couldn’t walk through walls?” He scoffed as he stood up. “Can I walk through walls.”

Hyuk dramatically walked up to Taekwoon’s bedroom door and didn’t stop. He just walked right through it and jumped right back as if it were nothing.

“I can fly too, watch!”

Hyuk jumped forward into the air but instead of floating like Taekwoon assumed he would do, Hyuk face-planted onto the floor.

“That’s not flying,” Taekwoon said, holding back his laughter.

“Taekwoon!? What was that noise?” He heard Hongbin yell from the next room over.

“Nothing! I just dropped something!” Taekwoon shouted back, apparently that was explanation enough because he didn’t hear anything else from his parents.

“You’re really trying to get me in trouble today, aren’t you?” Taekwoon hissed as Hyuk stood up off the ground.

“Sorry, I just wanted to make you laugh.” Hyuk said, before stepping off the ground like it were nothing. His body swung up into the air, making it look like he were lying on his side in an invisible bed. “I really can fly, though.”

“I see that,” Taekwoon said. “What’s so important about making me laugh?”

“You’ve got a cute smile.”

“Oh.”

That was the basis for their relationship: questions, answers and a whole lot of playful banter. It bordered on flirtatious sometimes but as the days passed by, Taekwoon found he cared less and less about the fact he was flirting with a ghost.

“Does everything still work?”

“Taekwoon! What kind of question is that?”

“A question… you died when you were eighteen. Surely you still have like… urges even if you are dead.”

“Never in a million years would I have thought I’d be asked that question.”

“You still haven’t answered.”

“Yes, it still works, ya weirdo. Everything else does so why wouldn’t that?”

“I don’t know, I was just curious.”

“Alright, you pervert.”

But most of Taekwoon’s questions were serious ones.

“What did it feel like to die?”

“Why do you want to know?”

“Doesn’t everyone want to know?”

“Fair enough, it’s probably different based on how you die. But for me, it felt just like falling asleep, except I woke up a ghost.”

“How did you know you were a ghost?”

“Well no one acknowledged my presence and I saw my own body still lying in my bed so yeah…”

“How terrible.”

“Yeah, I was pretty upset about it for a while… I think I accidentally scared off this one family that lived here after my family moved away. I was pretty angry for a long time.”

“But not anymore?”

“After a few years I just accepted it. There was nothing else I really could do, anyway. Then you guys moved in!”

“Do you ever feel lonely?”

“I figure I’ll move on eventually but now I’ve got you so there’s no reason to feel lonely.”

“Do you need to like eat or sleep?”

“You ask a lot of questions.”

“You said I could.”

“I _can_ eat and sleep and all that but I don’t need to. I also don’t need to breathe but it’s kind of just habit at this point.”

“Do you still feel… like if I touched you?”

“Yeah I can… your hands are cold…”

It took Taekwoon two weeks to finally ask the one question that had been on his mind since he first met the ghost, though.

“I visited your grave today.” Taekwoon said, almost absentmindedly as Hyuk sat behind him, braiding his ever growing long black hair.

“Now why would you go do something as depressing as that?” Hyuk asked with a laugh.

“I wanted to make sure I wasn't just crazy,” he answered, leaning back against Hyuk’s chest. He was situated between the ghost’s long legs as they spent one Friday night just relaxing together.

“So you visited a graveyard… you know it's very hard to braid your hair when you sit like that.”

“Then just stop, I don't need my hair braided.” Taekwoon said, looking up at the pouting ghost.

“Fine, fine.” Hyuk conceded, wrapping his arms loosely around Taekwoon’s waist instead. “I did actually exist, you know.”

“Yeah, I just know that for certain now.” Taekwoon got comfortable against Hyuk's shoulder. “But…”

“But?”

“You never told me your full name’s Sanghyuk.” Taekwoon teased.

“I didn't think it was important… everyone called me just Hyuk when I was alive…”

“Hmm… okay.”

The pair grew quiet, sitting content just to be with each other for a moment. But Taekwoon still had one question.

“How did you die, Hyuk?”

“You've finally asked it,” Hyuk said with a laugh. “Do you really want to know?”

Taekwoon nodded and he felt Hyuk take a deep breath.

“It's not very interesting and not all that tragic but well, when I was sixteen I got really sick. Like really sick and no one could figure out what it was.”

“For two years?”

“Yeah… it really kind of sucked because I couldn't do anything except lie in bed and feel like death. Then one day, I just fell asleep and never woke up… and you know the rest from there…” Hyuk’s voice cracked as he told his story. Taekwoon felt bad for even asking.

“I'm sorry…” Taekwoon couldn't help the sadness that leaked into his voice. Hyuk was quick to pick up on it too.

“Hey,” he said, maneuvering himself so that he sat in front of Taekwoon. A gentle hand came up to Taekwoon’s chin, carefully pushing his face up so he would look Hyuk in the eye as he spoke. “Think about it this way, if none of that happened I would have never met you.”

“Yeah but you could've lived a full life…”

“It's not like I really had a choice… besides with the way things turned out, I really can't complain too much.” Hyuk said with a bright smile, leaning forward so that their foreheads were touching.

“What do you mean?” Taekwoon was surprised to find himself not backing away from the advance.

“I mean, if I could replay the moment I died, do something differently, I would die every time just for the chance of seeing you again.”

“That's really cheesy.”

“I’ve told you before, I'm a bit of a hopeless romantic.” They both laughed, leaning forward just a bit more.

That was the first time Hyuk had kissed him.

Taekwoon didn't exactly know for sure, this being his first kiss and all, but kissing Hyuk felt like kissing any other human. He smelled like sugar and grass after a rainstorm as his arms pulled him closer. His hair felt silky soft as Taekwoon ran his hands through it again and again. His body was sturdy pressed against his own. His lips were smooth and gentle and incredibly plush against his own. His hands ever so careful as they ran along under Taekwoon’s shirt.

It seemed neither of them really knew what they were doing, though; both horribly inexperienced in the ways of dating. But neither of them really cared. Their lips still moved in sync, brushing lightly against the other’s until Hyuk took it further. Then their tongues tangled languidly between them. It was slow but still passion filled and Taekwoon never wanted it to end.

He lost his first kiss to a ghost… how would he ever tell his parents this one?

But Taekwoon never did say anything to his parents. How could he? They would never believe him anyway. He’d just end up on the first train to the crazy house. Did making out with a ghost make him a necrophiliac? He tried not to think of the answer to that question… it wasn’t like Hyuk was a dead body. He was more alive than a lot of the people Taekwoon knew from school… So he just pushed that thought aside and tried not to think too much about how his- for all intents and purposes- boyfriend was actually dead. Besides his and Hyuk’s relationship wasn’t too serious…

Until it was…

“What were you even doing the first time I saw you?” Taekwoon asked as he stood in front of the stove, cooking dinner. It was risky talking to Hyuk out where his family could easily hear him but he didn’t care. He’d become immensely good at making up excuses.

“You’re never going to let me live that down, are you?” Hyuk laughed, breath ghosting over Taekwoon’s ear. He was situated behind Taekwoon, arms wrapped around his waist, chest pressed to his back, and chin resting on Taekwoon’s shoulder.

“You scared me for four days straight,” Taekwoon complained, hitting Hyuk’s nose with his spoon, getting tomato sauce on the ghost’s face. “You owe me an explanation.”

“Fiiiiiine,” Hyuk whined, pressed a kiss to the back of Taekwoon’s neck. “But only because you’re so cute.”

“That’s it,” Taekwoon laughed, breaking free from Hyuk’s grasp and grabbing the nearest item for a weapon. Unfortunately that weapon turned out to be a tomato but it would work. “If I can’t get a straight answer-“

“Taekwoon? What are you doing?”

Taekwoon froze, looking in the kitchen doorway to find a very confused Jaehwan looking at him. Immediately, he set the tomato down as he heard Hyuk chuckle, felt the ghost wrap his arms around Taekwoon’s middle once more.

“N-nothing,” Taekwoon answered.

“That wasn’t very convincing,” Hyuk whispered with a quiet chuckle. Taekwoon elbowed him in the gut. “So cruel…” the ghost whined, grabbing onto to Taekwoon a little tighter.

Jaehwan looked at him apprehensively.

“And you all say I’m crazy, Taekwoon’s threatening a tomato in here!” Jaehwan shouted for the house to hear.

“You are crazy,” Taekwoon said before trying to turn back to his cooking. Hyuk held him in his place, though, refusing to let Taekwoon move.

“Yeah I’m the crazy one. Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, dinner’s almost ready,” Taekwoon said through a forced smile. He stopped struggling against Hyuk’s grasp to look more convincing.

“Okay…” Jaehwan left the kitchen.

“You ass,” Taekwoon scolded, turning around in Hyuk’s arms to hit at the taller’s chest. “Are you trying to make my family think I’m crazy?”

“No… You’re just fun to tease.” Hyuk laughed before swooping down to steal a slow kiss from Taekwoon.

“Jerk.”

Taekwoon’s question didn’t get answered until after dinner, when the pair laid together on Taekwoon’s bed. Hyuk was a master of avoiding questions he didn’t want to answer… and Taekwoon had become a master of getting his answers after forcing so many out of Hyuk.

“You never answered my question,” Taekwoon said from his spot, resting against Hyuk’s chest. The only tell that Hyuk actually wasn’t alive was that Taekwoon couldn’t hear a heartbeat.

“Oh right…”

“So what were you doing?”

“I was watching you sleep…”

“Oh?” Taekwoon rolled himself on top of Hyuk. “I thought you said you weren’t being creepy.”

“I lied.” Hyuk said in between kisses Taekwoon pressed to his lips.

“Why?”

“Because you looked… and you’re not allowed to hit me… You looked so beautiful.”

“W-what?”

Hyuk used Taekwoon’s surprise to flip their positions.

“You’re always beautiful, but that’s especially true when you’re sleeping. You look so peaceful and worry free.” Hyuk kissed along Taekwoon’s jaw.

“You watch me sleep a lot?” Taekwoon sighed at the feeling of Hyuk’s lips on his skin.

“Not really, I’ve just noticed it. You’re always stunning, though.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Then let me show you.”

That night, Taekwoon lost a lot more to a ghost than just his first kiss.

How was he ever going to tell his parents that?

He was falling way too deep to just never tell them about his first relationship. Hakyeon had been pressuring him for so long about getting a boyfriend… still pressured him about it daily. And now that he had one- albeit an unconventional one- there was just no easy way to bring the subject up.

But before he could ever hope of telling his parents anything… he had to tell Hyuk something first.

“Why do you love me?” Taekwoon asked as he drew patterns on Hyuk’s bare chest one afternoon. It was one of the rare times they had the entire house to themselves; they always made full use of that time and in the aftermath, Taekwoon felt he had to ask his last pressing question.

“What makes you ask that?” Hyuk kissed the top of Taekwoon’s head.

“Can’t you just answer the question?”

“It’s just because I love you, I don’t have much more of an explanation than that. It’s just you… everything even your weird side.”

“My weird side?”

“Don’t play coy, you’re like the one weird kid in the corner that only occasionally says stuff but when you do its batshit crazy when you feel like it.”

“How romantic.”

“Hey it’s the truth…” Hyuk shifted to be eye level with Taekwoon. “And I still love you for it.”

“I… I think I love you, too.”

They lazily kissed for god knew how long. Only breaking apart when they heard the front door open.

That reminded Taekwoon of something…

He had to tell his parents he had a ghost boyfriend…

And what better time to do it than when he was already far too invested in a relationship?

“What are you doing?” Hyuk asked, watching as Taekwoon rolled off the bed and began putting on his scattered clothes.

“I have to tell my parents about you,” Taekwoon said as he pulled on his jeans.

“What? Why?” Hyuk suddenly looked nervous, the first time he had since Taekwoon met him.

“Because… I feel like my parents should know I'm in a serious relationship, both in the sexual and emotional aspect.”

“Okay yeah that makes sense and all but I think you're forgetting the fact that your boyfriend is a _ghost!”_

“No I haven't forgotten that…”

“They're not going to believe you…”

“What if they see you?”

“If your mom sees me I'm going to be murdered.”

“You're already dead.”

“Your point?”

“Alright you do you but I don't wanna show myself to them yet…”

“Fine.” Taekwoon huffed, “can you at least offer emotional support?”

“Yeah fine.”

And as expected… his parents didn't believe him.

“So let me get this straight… you have a boyfriend…”

Taekwoon nodded despite the obvious sarcasm and disbelief in Hakyeon’s voice.

“And it’s pretty serious…”

Another nod.

“But we can't meet him because he's scared of me…”

“Yeah…”

“And he's also a ghost that's been living in this house for twenty years…”

Taekwoon nodded.

“You've got such an active imagination for an eighteen year old, Woonie. You should write a book about that.”

“It'd be a better love story than Twilight,” Hongbin laughed.

“Can I ask a question?” Jaehwan asked from his spot leaning against Wonsik on the couch.

“What?”

“Are you saying that you've actually fucked a ghost?”

“Jaehwan language,” Hakyeon said, only half paying attention at this point.

“What kind of question is that?” Taekwoon shrieked. But he figured his blush gave Jaehwan all the answer he needed.

“I'll take that as a yes but how does that work?”

Taekwoon left the room in a huff.

“They were surprisingly more chill about that than I thought,” Hyuk said, materializing on Taekwoon’s bed.

“They'd never believe me unless they see you.”

“Yeah but-“

Hyuk’s voice was cut off by a knock on his door.

“Taekwoon, can we come in?”

It was Wonsik’s voice on the other side of the door. Taekwoon situated himself on the bed, leaning into Hyuk’s side in a way that still made it look like he was propping himself up. Hyuk laughed, wrapping his arms around Taekwoon.

“You're not going to ask any more stupid questions are you?” Taekwoon asked.

“You've asked the same questions, you know…” Hyuk pointed out but shut up after Taekwoon sent him a glare.

“I won't… I can't make any promises for Jaehwan, though.”

“Hey! I'm respectable!”

“Fine, it’s unlocked,” Taekwoon shouted with an eye roll and in came Jaehwan and Wonsik. “Did you need something?”

“Yeah, I just wanted to let you know that I believe you.” Wonsik said.

“Really?” Taekwoon said, before confusion took over disbelief. “Why?”

“Well, I've seen the ghost.”

“Yeah, he's probably the asshole who’s been haunting my toothbrush for ten years,” Jaehwan said angrily. “Even when I get a new one! It still flies around the room!”

Hyuk cracked up next to Taekwoon. Jaehwan’s complaints were ignored, however.

“You've seen him?”

“Occasionally…”

“I’m really bad at focusing on staying invisible…” Hyuk admitted quietly next to Taekwoon.

“Oh, well thanks for being the ones to believe me.”

“Yeah no problem.”

“Just tell him to leave my toothbrush out of his haunting.”

So he had half of his family on his side. And as he had initially said, it took Hakyeon seeing the ghost for him to finally believe his son. Except it wasn't exactly the way Taekwoon had wanted.

They had been in a... compromising position, to say the least.  Taekwoon straddling Hyuk’s hips while they kissed deeply. Hyuk’s shirt had been discarded a while ago and Hyuk had Taekwoon’s pushed far up his chest, soon to be discarded as well. Hyuk was just in the process of undoing Taekwoon’s jeans when Hakyeon decided to walk in.

“Taekwoon, have you seen- oh my god!” Hakyeon shrieked as he shielded his eyes.

“Mom!” Taekwoon shouted, jumping out of Hyuk’s lap and fixing his clothes as fast as possible. Of course the one time Hakyeon comes into his room without knocking is the time he's heavily making out with his ghostly boyfriend. “It's not what it looks like!”

That was a lie. It really was exactly what it looked like but he felt he had to try and soften the blow somehow. Apparently that didn't work…

“Are you sure, Taekwoon? Because I think it's exactly what it looks like!” Hakyeon said, still covering his eyes. Taekwoon and Hyuk sat next to each other on the bed, faces equally red and guilty as Hakyeon continued to shout. Taekwoon was just glad Hyuk hadn't vanished at the first sign of a problem, even if he was still shirtless it was nice having Hakyeon finally meet Hyuk. Though, the circumstances were less than ideal.

“Who is this boy? How did he even get in here?”

“This is Hyuk…” Taekwoon started carefully. “He's the one I told you about…”

“You've never told me you had a boyfriend!” Hakyeon shrieked again.

“Yes I did… no one believed me.”

“Wait, wait, wait…” Hakyeon's anger slowly gave way to confusion as he continued. “You're telling me… that this boy. Here. Is actually a ghost?”

Taekwoon nodded and Hyuk waved nervously.

“And he actually exists…”

Taekwoon could practically see the gears turning in his mother’s head as he mumbled to himself, putting the pieces together slowly: “The ghost exists… my son has a boyfriend that's a ghost… my son was kissing said boyfriend…”

And it all came down to one furious statement, one that came out as practically a hiss of air:

“That ghost fucked my son…”

Hyuk had been right when he worried Taekwoon’s mother would try to murder him at finding out about his existence. Taekwoon could safely say he never expected to have to stop his mother from murdering someone who was already dead… or chase him around the house while he chased Hyuk around the house, who was fearing for his nonexistent life.

It was a spectacle to behold, to say the least.

“Why can't I have a hot ghost in love with me?” Jaehwan complained as he did nothing to help.

“Right, don't mind your boyfriend or anything, I'll just be over there killing myself.” Wonsik commented, rolling his eyes.

But despite all the chasing and plots of murder, after Hakyeon had calmed down and the situation was explained to a very confused Hongbin, everything turned out okay.

Well, as okay as it could be with this whacked family.

Hakyeon begrudgingly accepted their relationship- so long as he didn't find them making out ever again. Taekwoon wasn't allowed to have closed doors anymore, either.

Everyone, at first, had found it really strange that Taekwoon was dating a ghost but the more they got to know Hyuk, the less and less strange it became. He was allowed to roam the house freely without hiding himself for the first time since he woke up a ghost. Taekwoon didn't think he'd ever seen him so happy in the four months that he had known him. Hyuk could have some semblance of a normal life again, even if he was dead. But he'd still claim he was so happy because he could now openly show his love everywhere and in front of everyone. That statement always made Taekwoon happy, too.

And their family of five became six…

Until Taekwoon had to leave for college.

He knew this relationship was never going to last because, honestly, how could it? Hyuk was dead and nothing Taekwoon could say to convince himself otherwise was going to change that.

It was easy to pretend.

Through all the warm hugs, soft kisses, and whispered words of love, Taekwoon could just pretend he was in any other relationship; even if he hadn’t been in any other relationship and probably didn’t know any better. But he did know he loved his ghost… and that he’d have to let him go eventually.

Too bad Taekwoon sucked at saying goodbye.

It was hard enough saying goodbye to his schoolmates, and even the temporary goodbye to his family was going to be horrible.

But as he stood in his partially empty bedroom, facing an equally teary-eyed Hyuk, he could not help the overwhelming emotions that washed over him. He leaped into Hyuk’s arms, tears flowing freely down his cheeks.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Hyuk said, running a hand soothingly through the hair on the back of Taekwoon’s head.

“How can you say that?” Taekwoon buried his face further against Hyuk’s chest.

“We’ll see each other again, I don’t know how or why or when but we will…” Hyuk said in an attempt to comfort him.

“How do you know that?”

“I’ll find you… I promise.”

“I’ll hold you to that.”

But Taekwoon knew. He had always known. His relationship was doomed from the start.

And as he closed his front door, closed the door on his Hyuk, he knew he was saying goodbye for the last time.

A lonely feeling settled in his chest at the thought.

University life was hard to get used to at first. He made friends and occasionally went on dates but he could never shake that feeling of loneliness. Sure, he would attend a few parties and every now and then he’d go on a second date with someone. Sure, his studies were going great and soon he’d get to live out a lifelong dream of getting a career with something to do with music. Sure, he still had his family to support him and he loved how understanding they were being.

But every time he came home during the holidays or just to visit, his ghost wouldn’t be there, he couldn’t feel that ever playful and happy presence settled into every room of the house anymore.

That hurt the most.

His second year of college went practically the same way as his first, and his third, found him moving in to his own apartment… one that he shared with Jaehwan and Wonsik to save money. His parents were putting three kids through college… it was the least Taekwoon could do. Even if Jaehwan was the single most annoying roommate he had ever had.

“Taekwoon! I’m hungry,” he complained for around the sixtieth time. Even Wonsik looked annoyed as Jaehwan laid sprawled out on their sofa with his head hanging off the side.

“I don’t know what you want me to do about it. We ordered pizza thirty minutes ago, it’ll be here soon,” Taekwoon said, scrolling absentmindedly through his emails.

“Make it come faster!”

“Jaehwannie, why don’t you go write that paper you’ve been complaining about,” Wonsik tried.

“I can’t, I’m too hungry.”

“Why did I ever agree to let you live here?” Taekwoon hissed.

“Hey! You didn’t have a choice!”

“That’s what mom told you.”

Thankfully, their doorbell rang then, silencing whatever Jaehwan was about to shout next.

“Thank God, I’ll get it,” Taekwoon exclaimed, standing up to answer the door.

And when he opened it, he almost collapsed to the ground in shock.

The delivery guy looked painfully familiar. His hair was black instead of platinum blond. His eyes, brown instead of red. He wore heavy clothes and a jacket that was zipped up above his mouth because of the harsh weather outside. He was taller than Taekwoon remembered, taller so that he had to look up into his eyes. But there was no mistaking it, two years having done nothing to erase the memory of him. How or why or when didn’t matter.

“Hyuk,” Taekwoon breathed.

The man in front of him looked confused.

“Sanghyuk, actually but uhh… pizza?” He laughed nervously, holding out the two large boxes of pizza he was paid to deliver.

“I’ll take those!” Jaehwan shouted, pushing past a stunned Taekwoon to grab the boxes. “Make sure you tip him, Woonie!”

Taekwoon dug out his wallet, thankful for the distraction from a still very confused ‘Sanghyuk’.

“Thanks,” he said as Taekwoon handed him a few singles. “Do I…?”

Sanghyuk took a deep breath.

“Do I know you from somewhere?”


	2. Sanghyuk

Sanghyuk had always lived a pretty normal life… well as normal of a life as he could with memories that weren’t his own swirling around in his head.

It hadn’t always been like this. He’d actually lived a pretty normal life up until he turned sixteen. Then, everything came crashing down on him, weighing him down like a ton of rocks.

He didn’t get much: The pull of lips into a smile; soft, black hair; the smell of coffee made a very specific way; a melodious voice singing gorgeously just for him; whispered words of love. Only fragments. Something would happen and suddenly Sanghyuk would be struck with a million different fragments of a memory. Never enough to clue him in to what they were memories of, but enough to leave him hopelessly confused. Especially since the fragments of memories left him increasingly lonely for reasons he couldn’t even begin to understand.

He had friends, his family adored and cared for him, he went on tons of dates, but nothing seemed to quell the growing loneliness that began one very late night in the August of his sixteenth year. He’d go on a date with a really nice guy, after he’d determined that he was in fact gay, and they’d hit it off wonderfully and yet, something would tell him it wasn’t right. Who he was comparing all these guys to, Sanghyuk didn’t know. But something certainly was missing. Something that apparently meant a whole lot to him because he was turning down tons of wonderful people for this unknown person.

The one and only time he’d brought these confusing memories to someone, he was only left with more questions.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me lately, Jimin,” he complained dejectedly, laying his head on the table they sat at.

“What else is new?” Jimin asked distractedly, mashing buttons on his controller, eyes trained on the computer screen in front of him.

“First off, rude,” Sanghyuk started. Sure, he complained a lot but this time he seriously needed the advice. He’d wake up in the middle of the night from dreams full of memories he’d never witnessed but couldn’t remember what they were about. He needed to know what was going on with him and he was hoping his friend, Jimin, would have some advice for him. “And second, I’m being serious! I don’t know what to do…”

Jimin didn’t move for another few minutes, focused solely on the game in front of him. Sanghyuk sighed deeply, deciding that his friend was too engrossed in his video game to help him. But then Jimin cussed loudly as his character was killed and the game ended. He threw down the controller, took off his headphones and turned to Sanghyuk.

“All right, I’ll bite. What’s so terribly important?” He teased. Sanghyuk ignored the jab.

“I keep seeing these… things…”

“That’s real specific.”

“I don’t know what they are.”

“Maybe you should speak to a therapist. You are at the prime age for a schizophrenic break,” Jimin laughed, leaning back in his chair.

“Haha very funny, but it’s not like that,” Sanghyuk started, shaking his head. “I don’t hear voices or see people that aren’t there.”

“Then what did you mean ‘see things’?”

“I-I don’t really know… they’re like these memories… memories of things I know I’ve never experienced.”

Sanghyuk waited for a response. He half-expected Jimin to just call him insane and go back to his video game; but, instead, his friend looked deep in thought.

“You ever heard of reincarnation?” He asked finally. Sanghyuk furrowed his eyebrows; what did that have to do with anything?

“What?” Sanghyuk asked in response. “Where did that come from?”

“My brother’s girlfriend was going on and on about all this reincarnation nonsense the other day. I didn’t think much of it at the time and I think my brother was just barely paying attention, but after hearing what you just said maybe it could help you explain some things,” Jimin elaborated.

“Oh… well yeah, I’ve heard of reincarnation,” Sanghyuk said. “Like once you die, you come back again, right?”

“Yeah,” Jimin started. “Except usually people are reborn without any of their past lives’ memories.”

“Are you trying to tell me that these memories I’m seeing are from a past life.”

“That depends,” Jimin said. “When did these ‘memories’ start appearing?”

“Around August, last year, right around the time I got sick and was sent to the hospital, remember?”

Jimin nodded before asking: “And are they full memories?”

“No, they’re fragments. Sometimes I’ll get a glimpse of like a smile or I’ll remember how something felt… like soft hair…”

Jimin thought about Sanghyuk’s answers for a second.

“I don’t think they’re your past life’s memories… those would be pretty clear and you’d have always had them. Not to mention you would’ve known, without a doubt, that they weren’t your own.”

“Then what are they?” Sanghyuk asked, grabbing at his hair. Fragments flashed through his head as he thought about them; he felt close to tears, longing for someone he didn’t even know. “They’re driving me crazy. Every time I get one I feel so lonely, like I’m missing something huge in my life but don’t know what. It’s gotta stop.”

Jimin grabbed his shoulder, looking extremely sympathetic.

“H-hey, calm down,” he started. “It’ll be okay… I didn’t realize this was such a huge problem. Why haven’t you told anyone about this?”

“I’ve already worried my parents enough with what happened, I still have to go to the doctor to get looked at every now and again, I don’t need them thinking I’m going insane on top of it,” Sanghyuk admitted quietly. Jimin’s expression turned to that of resolve at Sanghyuk’s words, like he was determined to help his friend in any way possible.

“I can’t remember everything my brother’s girlfriend was going on about but I got the gist of it I think…” Jimin started. “Basically, from what I remember, if a person dies young- meaning like unexpectedly young- part of the person’s soul moves on to be reincarnated. But the other part, the part that wasn’t ready to accept death stays behind.”

“You seem to remember an awful lot for a guy that was hardly paying attention,” Sanghyuk teased. Jimin hit him on the shoulder.

“All right, so my brother doesn’t have a girlfriend and I read up on this stuff by myself because I was curious. Now do you want my help or not?” Jimin scolded.

“Yes, yes I’m sorry.” Sanghyuk laughed before turning serious once more. “So, when you say a part of the soul stays behind… do you mean… like a ghost?”

“Yeah exactly like that. This can happen at any age but the bigger the part of the soul that wasn’t ready to die, the stronger the ghost left behind.”

“How does any of this help me?”

“Well, one part of the soul, the one that moved on, is reincarnated after some time but the other, the one that remained on earth, is left to wander the world of the living as a ghost. Both souls are fully aware of their surroundings and sometimes if the ghost is around long enough, both souls can be around in the world at the same time.”

“Okay… so you’re saying that one of my past lives probably died young… and now I’m experiencing memories that my ghostly other half is experiencing?”

“No… you two would be two separate beings with your own memories. Plus, that theory wouldn’t make sense since they just appeared last year.”

“So how would I have gotten the ghost’s memories?”

“If that’s what actually happened, that is,” Jimin said, rubbing at the side of his face, seeming to be having just as hard of a time believing all this as Sanghyuk even though he was the one relaying all the information. “This is just a theory but I don’t think there are any other explanations. But what I think… what I remember reading is that if the ghostly other half of the soul learns to accept its death, decided to move on, that is, that part of the soul reconnects with its origin. Wherever that soul may be.”

“So, if it’s been reincarnated, it’ll rejoin with that person?”

“Yeah exactly.”

“Why would that part decide to move on?”

“I dunno, honestly. But from the way you described your new memories it had to be because of someone super important to them.”

“Someone? Like a boyfriend?”

“Yeah, something like that. Must’ve been a pretty amazing guy for you to want to die for them,” Jimin teased.

“Oh haha,” Sanghyuk laughed, shaking his head. “What kind of wierdo falls in love with a ghost?”

“What kind of wierdo falls in love with you?” Jimin shot right back with a smile.

“You’re so mean!” Sanghyuk yelled, hitting Jimin playfully.

“Yeah, but seriously. Even if the ghost returned to actual you, you shouldn’t have gotten his memories. If that were the norm, then you’d be hearing a lot more stories similar to yours everywhere. So the memories you’ve gotten must’ve meant the world to the other guy for them to stick around.”

Everything suddenly made a lot more sense despite the fact that this entire situation was whack. A part of him was very happy about learning all this new information; he wondered if that was the part of him that had only recently returned. Could he really miss someone that he’d never even met before so much? Could all of this really be possible?

“Do you… Do you think the guy my other part met is still alive?”

“I can’t imagine why he wouldn’t be. It’s only been a year since your ghost’s moved on, right? So the guy he fell in love with is probably still alive.

And for whatever reason, that fact had calmed his fragmented mind immensely. Like the part of his soul that cried out desperately for an unknown man was content for now with the fact that there was hope. Hope that they could be reunited.

Sanghyuk couldn’t help but want to meet this guy. Meet the guy that a part of him had fallen so deeply in love with, if, for nothing more than to know who it was he missed so terribly.

And so, Sanghyuk’s life carried on as it had been before the return of part of his soul. He attended school and received excellent marks, a model student as all his teachers said. He made tons of friends; though he was loud and sarcastic, people enjoyed being around him. He kept up with his scheduled appointments to make sure the sickness that had almost killed him was, in fact, getting better; it was, thankfully, though he still broke down into coughing fits now and again. He joined his school’s dance club and found his true calling through all the sweat and aching muscles; though, his parents would never let him actually pursue and career in dance. So, he went into business after he graduated high school; he kept dancing on the side, however. It was good to have a hobby; his mother would tell him. Moving away from home and living on his own for University was hard at first but he wasn’t going to let that hold him back. He made new friends and joined a competitive dance team, kept his grades high enough to pass and was generally pretty happy with the way his life was going, even if he hated what he was studying in school, he only had like two real friends, and he barely had enough money to eat every week.

He would still get a fragment of a memory every now and again; and whenever he’d go on a date, he’d still find himself comparing the person to someone he’d never even met or seen before. But he found he didn’t so much mind that any more. They had meant so much to a previous life… he just wished they didn’t interfere so much in his dating life.

So, after a while, he just stopped dating all together; there was always something not quite right. It drove him crazy to no end but there was no helping it at this point. He started frequenting a local coffee shop, one block away from his dorm, just for the smell of it. He couldn’t stomach the stuff but the smell… the smell eased all his worries and calmed his mind enough to aid in his studying. It was such a weird phenomenon but he couldn’t help but feel at ease around the stuff, like he was being comforted by the person the smell reminded him of.

Unfortunately for him, such an expensive calming agent didn’t allow for much of anything else within his budget so he got a job as a pizza delivery boy. It didn’t pay all that much and took away time he could be using for studying but he needed the extra money. Besides, driving around as a job really wasn’t all that bad and he met a lot of interesting people.

But one encounter specifically stood out, he’d think on it for hours trying to regain any of the memories that had flashed through his mind when the door was opened.

It should’ve just been a normal delivery to an apartment complex. He delivered countless pizzas here to many a sleep deprived and starving college student and he assumed this one would be going to another of the sort. But when that door opened, Sanghyuk almost dropped the pizza he was paid to deliver out of sheer surprise.

“Hyuk,” the man at the door said, sounding as if all the air had suddenly left his lungs, escaping with the second syllable of Sanghyuk’s name.

He was tall; not quite as tall as Sanghyuk was himself but enough so that he only had to look down a couple millimeters. He had a mess of black hair that made him look as if he just woke up; the baggy sweatpants and ratty T-shirt just added to the look. He had very delicate features and plush lips that were twisted into a beautifully surprised smile. Such a smile immediately triggered thousands of memories of that exact smile to flash through Sanghyuk’s mind. So many feelings blossomed deep within Sanghyuk’s chest but above everything was the sudden desire to hug a man he was pretty sure he had never met before in his life. For whatever reason, this man felt so familiar, like he’d known him for a very long time. And the fact that the guy had known half of his name and seemed to recognize him as more than just some guy delivering pizza only added to his confusion.

“Sanghyuk, actually but uhh… pizza?” Sanghyuk said, trying to break the awkward silence. But he was pretty sure he only succeeded in making it more awkward. God, when did he become so bad at social interactions? Sure, the guy was cute but that usually didn’t make a huge difference in his ability to speak. So, he held out the pizza between them in another attempt to diffuse the situation; it didn’t really work either, smooth.

“I’ll take those!” Someone shouted from inside the apartment. A blur rushed around the man, grabbed the pizzas from Sanghyuk’s hands and rushed right back inside with a shout of “make sure to tip him, Woonie!”

The man shifted from his right foot to his left, clearly very nervous for reasons Sanghyuk couldn’t quite understand. He dug through his pants’ pockets until he pulled out a wallet, then handed over a couple bills.

“Thanks,” he said, taking the money the man offered him. The conversation died for a few seconds and with it came the growing feeling to ask a very burning question. “Do I…” He started, taking a deep breath before continuing.

“Do I know you from somewhere?”

Sanghyuk regretted the question almost the second he asked it. The man looked distraught at the words and as the seconds ticked by in silence, the sadness on his face only seemed to grow. He looked as if he wanted to say a million different things but wasn’t going to.

“No, I don’t think so…” The man said, eyes refusing to come off the floor. He couldn’t handle this anymore. He felt for some unimaginable reason like he had to do everything in his power to make this stranger smile at him again. Sanghyuk racked his brain for anything he could say to make it better. Somewhere, anywhere that he might have seen this man before… Then it came to him.

“Oh, I know! You’re in my psych lecture on Tuesdays and Thursday, right?” Something about the way the other man deflated a bit made Sanghyuk feel as if that wasn’t the right thing to say at all either. Even though Sanghyuk was fairly certain they shared the same psych lecture, it clearly wasn’t what the other was hoping for and didn’t account for all these feelings that Sanghyuk got just by looking at this man.

“Maybe…” the man practically whispered.

“How’d you know my name?” Sanghyuk asked, hoping for him to tell him something that would help him figure this out. But again, the man said nothing, only continued to stare at the floor like he couldn’t physically look anywhere else. But thankfully, they were saved by someone joining the other at the door.

“Hyung, what’s taking so long? Jaehwannie is going to eat all the pizza if you don’t grab some soon,” a familiar a face said.

Oh hey, Wonsik-hyung, I didn’t know you lived around here,” Sanghyuk said, hiding his relief with a smile, not missing the longing look the mystery man sent his way.

He knew Wonsik and his boyfriend, Jaehwan, from the dance team he was a part of. Wonsik was a really great dancer; Jaehwan tried, but wasn’t actually on the team. Too busy to actually compete seriously, he just likes to have the stress relief outlet so he comes to practice every now and again, he claimed.

“I didn’t know you were a pizza delivery guy,” Wonsik countered with a laugh.

“Touché… but speaking of which, I should probably get back to my job… pizzas aren’t going to deliver themselves and all…” Sanghyuk said, thankful to Wonsik for providing a reasonable way out of this awkward and confusing mess that was supposed to be an easy delivery.

“Yeah, of course. See you around,” his friend waved him off before going back inside his apartment.

“See you in psych, Taekwoon-ssi,” Sanghyuk said, the name he’d never received just slipping from his tongue like it were the most natural thing in the world. Taekwoon’s head snapped up upon hearing his name fall from what was supposed to be a stranger’s lips. And before Taekwoon could say anything in response, Sanghyuk spun on his heels and promptly ran from the building. How embarrassing, he hoped nothing as strange and confusing like that happened again. Between all the fragmented memories and both of them knowing each other’s names without ever having met before, it was all too much for him to handle. What was he going to do?

For one, he hoped to never see that guy again. All these sudden, unexpected feelings scared him. Where were they coming from? Had he actually just met the guy the other part of his soul had fallen in love with as Jimin had suggested a year ago? It would all make sense if that were the case but was it really that easy? He had been rather excited to meet the guy that he so deeply missed for two years but now that he had… he’d rather he hadn’t.

One thing was for sure, Sanghyuk didn’t want to run into Taekwoon again until he figured this all out. Unfortunately, the universe had other plans for him.

The next time he ran into Taekwoon, he literally ran into him. Whatever papers they’d both been holding scattered along with the scolding coffee that Taekwoon had been holding. The familiar smell sent waves of nostalgia over him for a time that Sanghyuk had never experienced. When he realized just who he had run in to, Sanghyuk went into full on panic mode. It’d only been two weeks since he first met him, he wasn’t ready for this.

“Oh fuck! Sorry, that was totally my fault,” Sanghyuk quickly apologized, picking up all the papers- regardless of who’s they were- before they blew away in the wind.

“No, it’s okay,” Taekwoon said quietly. “I wasn’t paying attention.”

“Oh jeeze,” Sanghyuk said, pretending to notice the coffee that was poured over the both of them for the first time. “I’m sorry about your coffee…”

Taekwoon looked down at his coat with a bit of a bewildered expression on his face, as if he hadn’t noticed it before then. It was pretty drenched and there was more coffee on them than in the cup. At least it looked like none of the papers Sanghyuk had salvaged from the snow had any of the liquid on them.

“It’s fine…” Taekwoon said. “Just coffee.”

“Let me buy you a new one.”

Now that was a shock. For the both of them. The words were out of Sanghyuk’s mouth before he even realized he thought them. What was he doing? He needed to sort his mind out before he spent more time with the person causing his confusion.

“What?” Taekwoon looked as shocked as Sanghyuk felt. But he couldn’t turn back now. It would be even weirder if he suddenly took it back with no reasonable explanation besides: “I have these memories about you dating my ghostly past-life so I can’t talk to you right now.”

“Our stuff is kind of a mess…” Sanghyuk held out their papers.

“And we’re both covered in coffee…” he shook his arms for emphasis.

“And it’s kind of my fault so it’s the least I can do… unless you have a lecture of something…”

It looked as if Taekwoon was seriously considering his options. A small part of Sanghyuk really wanted the other man to stay but he wasn’t sure if he could handle a full-length conversation and come out with his mind intact.

“No…” Taekwoon said finally. “I’ve got some time.”

Sanghyuk let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding.

“Great! I was just heading to a coffee shop anyway! It’s cold out here, so let’s hurry.”

So Sanghyuk led the two of them to a nearby coffee shop. He asked Taekwoon to find a table while he ordered for them. Taekwoon gave him a slightly confused look as he took the papers from Sanghyuk to go find a seat. He ordered their drinks and didn’t have to wait long for them to be made. When Sanghyuk returned and placed the two cups on the table, Taekwoon had already started sorting through the papers.

“Oh hey! It’s you again!” Sanghyuk exclaimed as he sat down, pretending as if he hadn’t recognized Taekwoon earlier. He figured that’d come off less creepy. “I didn’t recognize you through all those jackets.”

“Do I know you?” Taekwoon asked as Sanghyuk started taking off his own layers.

“Maybe you’d remember if I had a couple pizza boxes…” Sanghyuk laughed, nervously scratching the back of his head. Of course Taekwoon wouldn’t recognize him, he was just his pizza guy once… That he’d known the name of…

“Oh… right…”

Sanghyuk deflated a bit. Maybe his past life had looked different, more attractive and easily recognizable.

So, to distract himself from the emanate mental breakdown, he finished undressing his winter garb, pulling off his hat with a huff and finally sitting down. Taekwoon stared at him in a stunned silence as he watched him run a hand through his hair… freshly bleached hair at that.

“What?” Sanghyuk asked, feeling a little self-conscious. If his hair got a bad reception, it was all Jaehwan’s fault.

“You bleached your hair,” Taekwoon said, averting his eyes.

“So you did recognize me!” Sanghyuk exclaimed, feeling suddenly very happy despite himself. “But yeah, a friend of mine said he needed someone to practice on for a class… he said he wanted to make it platinum blond but it came out a more dirty-blond than anything. He thinks it turned out all right though, said it’ll make me stand out more.”

Taekwoon cleared his throat, looking rather disgruntled before asking: “Do you mind if I ask who did it?”

“Yeah, his name’s Jaehwan… do you know him?”

“He’s my brother… well my adoptive brother.”

“Right, I knew that,” Sanghyuk said, feeling stupid for not remembering that. But then he thought that that was not something he would actually know… “You guys live together,” he tried to cover up. Taekwoon nodded, seemingly debating on if he should actually ask what he wanted to or not.

“Why do you want to stand out more?” He finally asked.

“Oh well…” Sanghyuk hadn’t really thought that one through. Jaehwan had come up to him the other day, crying about how he needed help practicing for some beauty class he was taking. Sanghyuk didn’t know what else to do so he told Jaehwan he’d help him out, came up with the excuse that he ‘wanted to stand out more anyway’. Plus, he rather liked the idea of being blond… he couldn’t fathom why but it just felt right at the moment. “You didn’t even recognize me and I’m close with your brothers.”

It was a bad reason but Taekwoon’s excuse sounded even worse.

“I’m terrible with faces.”

“Oh well, you’ll remember me now,” Sanghyuk teased, trying to lighten up the mood.

“Hmm, yes, the guy who spilled my coffee all over me.”

“Are you making a joke?”

Taekwoon looked away, barely holding back a smile, as Sanghyuk looked at him incredulously.

“Wow, I buy you a replacement and I’m still _that_ guy.”

“Sorry,” Taekwoon laughed with a shrug, finally taking a sip of his cooled down coffee. He pulled a confused face as he pulled the cup away. “Is this hot chocolate?”

“Oh! My bad,” Sanghyuk exclaimed, slightly embarrassed that Taekwoon had discovered his well-kept secret. He switched their two cups quickly. “I must’ve got the cups mixed up. I’m sorry I haven’t drunk out of the other one yet so it should be okay.”

“Oh okay,” Taekwoon said, looking at him skeptically. “You go to a coffee shop to order hot chocolate?”

“I can’t stand the taste of coffee… Don’t laugh at me!”

“I’m not laughing.”

“You don’t need to, I can see it in your eyes! Not everyone can be so sophisticated as you, Mister Latte.”

“How’d you know I drink lattes?” Taekwoon asked suddenly.

“What?” Sanghyuk asked. “I ordered your drink.”

“I didn’t tell you what to get me though.”

“Oh…” How did he know? He didn’t even notice, it just came out naturally. “I don’t know… lucky guess?”

“Hmm…” Taekwoon hid a smile behind his cup.

“Jerk,” Sanghyuk pouted.

“Well regardless of all that, it was nice to formally meet you, Sanghyuk,” Taekwoon said, standing up and pulling his coat back on. He picked up his pile of sorted papers and waved goodbye. “I’ll see you around.”

“Yeah okay,” Sanghyuk nodded, waving goodbye back. Taekwoon gave him a small smile before turning and leaving the shop.

Sanghyuk couldn’t get Taekwoon out of his mind after having that brief meeting in the coffee shop, though he supposed the fact that he started seeing the older male everywhere after that didn’t help him any. They started running into each other a lot more, thankfully not literally again. He’d see him almost every morning in that coffee shop when he had a break between his dance practices and his first classes of the day. Their eyes would meet across the shop as Taekwoon was in line to order and Sanghyuk sat in his usual corner table by himself working on his various assignments. Taekwoon would give him a small chuckle and shake his head at Sanghyuk every time for frequenting a coffee shop yet only ever ordering hot chocolate. Sanghyuk would stick his tongue out at Mr. Sophisticated and get back to his work, stealing glances at the very attractive male who he remembered from another life.

They’d see each other in the music building as Sanghyuk was either going to or leaving the dance studios throughout the afternoon. He’d offer a wave or a small smile and Taekwoon would always look away and blush in embarrassment at being singled out of the crowds. Which, of course, only made Sanghyuk want to do it more often.

He’d seen Taekwoon whenever he and his brothers ordered a pizza too; though, Sanghyuk suspected that his friends were requesting him because it happened way too often for it to just be a coincidence at this point.

But probably the most prominent time he saw Taekwoon was at the campus library. But not during normal hours of the day- oh no- it was almost always late at night and an hour before the building would close for the night.

Sanghyuk had always liked reading, used it as a good past-time when he had time to kill. He’d been doing it a lot lately, ever since he moved into a dorm and out of his parents’ house. Only problem was that he blew through his small collection rather fast with all the spare time he found he had now. Maybe he should make more friends… but that was hard and reading was easy, so he’d just stick to reading.

So one night, after all his classes and time spent getting ready for an upcoming dance showcase, he ventured to the university library, hoping to find something to read. He wandered around the main floor of the library, passing the front desk who knows how many times and making countless circles around the entirely of the building. He really hadn’t expected it to be so hard to find the fiction section in a library, but here he was, hopelessly lost and entirely confused. Thankfully, his savior came to him as he walked by the librarian’s desk for the umpteenth time.

“All right, what are you looking for?” The student who was manning the front desk finally stopped him, placing down the book that had been keeping him company for the entirety of Sanghyuk’s time there. He pushed his glasses further up his face as he beckoned for Sanghyuk to come closer.

“What?” Sanghyuk asked, feeling even more confused by the second, if that was even possible. He halted his useless wanderings and walked up to the desk timidly. As Sanghyuk approached the front desk he realized just who it was behind those thick-rimmed glasses and disgruntled, tired appearance. He really hadn’t ever seen Taekwoon without him being super put together and effortlessly elegant. He looked a hot mess at the current moment. “Oh, it’s you… you wear glasses?”

“Oh yeah,” Taekwoon said, messing with his frames self-consciously. “I got them last year, they’re to make me look more sophisticated… and to help me read…”

“Ha!” Sanghyuk laughed, hoping that he didn’t appear as nervous as he felt. Waving and smiling at him in passing was one thing but it’d been a while since he actually held a conversation with the older male. “You made another joke! Though, I think you would be funnier if you said it with more emotion.”

“Yeah maybe,” he shrugged with a small smile. “Didn’t you need help finding something?”

“I also did not know you were a student librarian…”

“Stop avoiding the question.”

“Avoiding the question?” Sanghyuk faked. He really didn’t want this guy to know how much of a nerd he could be. Reading for enjoyment? Yeah, that would earn him a high place in Taekwoon’s mind. Though he was unsure of why he cared so much about that but he couldn’t help it at this point. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“What are you doing here?” Taekwoon tried again, cutting off Sanghyuk’s nervous ramblings.

“Looking for a book…” Sanghyuk answered carefully, keeping it purposefully vague for as long as possible. Though, it was beginning to look like Taekwoon was well versed in the art of getting answers out of difficult people.

“Okay… what kind of book?” Taekwoon started, significantly less annoyed with Sanghyuk than he would think someone would be. “School-related? Non-fiction? Fiction?”

“Uhm… fantasy maybe? Or Sci-fy? Fiction… I’m looking for fiction.”

“Is it for a class?”

“…No…”

“Then you want one for personal use?”

“Yeah…”

“Why couldn’t you have just said that?”

“I didn’t want you to think I was a nerd or something like that…”

Taekwoon cleared his throat, gesturing to the book he had been reading- probably for enjoyment- the entire time Sanghyuk had been wandering confused. Sanghyuk felt a wave of embarrassment wash over him.

“Shut up, you jerk! I don’t care how stupid that sounds! It was my thought process at the time, however illogical it might have been!”

“Is that anyway to talk to your elder?” Taekwoon teased.

“Oh yeah, sorry old man,” Sanghyuk shot right back.

“I’m only two years older than you.”

“Your point?”

“Why were you worried about what I thought about you?”

“Nice change of subject, maybe you should…”

“Maybe you just should answer the question.”

“Wow, can’t you just help me find a book?”

“Fine, I think I might have something for you.”

So Taekwoon showed Sanghyuk to the one corner selection of books Sanghyuk hadn’t checked. Of course… But regardless, Taekwoon recommended a fantasy series he was sure Sanghyuk would love. And it turned out to be the right move on Taekwoon’s part. Sanghyuk was hooked after the first book; though, for whatever reason Sanghyuk got the feeling while reading that he had read that series before… But that didn’t make any sense. He would’ve recognized the name when Taekwoon pointed it out.

He started frequenting the library a lot more often after that, wondering every time if Taekwoon had picked this book series on purpose or if it was just an honest suggestion. He never could figure it out but he found he didn’t much care. He liked talking to Taekwoon, it was easy and natural. He always felt nervous going in but came out wishing he could talk longer. So, he’d hang around after he checked out a new book and Taekwoon always seemed happy for the company. Sanghyuk figured he probably didn’t get too many visitors so late at night.

“What are you studying here, hyung?”

“Music composition.”

“Really? So are Wonsik and Jaehwan.”

“We’re a family of musicians.”

“Oh yeah, because your father is Cha Hakyeon.”

“Mother.”

“What?”

“Nothing, but yeah, that’s a big part of it.”

“Cool…”

“What are you studying?”

“Business, because I’m boring.”

“It’s not boring, that’s important too. You could be Wonsik or Jaehwan’s agent.”

“Oh true! I could be yours too.”

“Why would you want to?”

“Wow, harsh…”

“Yeah, yeah.”

Sanghyuk yawned suddenly, turning his comeback into a series of incomprehensible noises. He didn’t have much time during the day to come visit so he always came at around the same time: entirely too late to be hanging around a library.

“Why do you always come in so late?” Taekwoon asked, trying to hide his concern through a nonchalant question. Sanghyuk saw straight through it but decided not to comment on it just in case he had read the signs wrong.

“What do you mean?” He asked instead.

“I mean, it’s late… almost midnight. You’re practically falling asleep over there.”

“Oh… well I have practice in the morning, classes in the afternoon and I usually do my homework in the evenings so here I am?”

Taekwoon nodded in understanding.

“Why? Do I bother you?” Sanghyuk teased, but he really did want to know the answer.

“No…” Taekwoon said quietly. “Not really.”

Sanghyuk couldn’t exactly explain why such a simple admittance made him so happy. He had a sneaking suspicion that his other ghostly self’s memories had a really big part in it. But could Taekwoon really be the person he fell in love with in another time? It was almost too easy. Too coincidental that Sanghyuk had found him so soon after getting those memories. Such good things like that never happened to him.

But, even so, Sanghyuk felt an undeniable attraction towards the quiet older man. He often wondered about that too. Did he really, actually like Taekwoon or- if Taekwoon was his mysterious missing person- did he only feel attracted to him because of someone else’s memories? It really worried him because regardless of what his past-lives had done or who they had fallen in love with, Sanghyuk was his own person. He wanted to choose who he wanted to be with for real without feeling so God damn guilty over ‘cheating’ on someone he never really had feelings for in the first place. But still, he found himself hopelessly drawn to Taekwoon every time he saw an opening to talk with him.

He hadn’t been wrong when he had said they had the same psych lecture together. He saw the man every Tuesday and Thursday at two o’clock in the afternoon. He never really paid much attention to him during the first half of the semester since he was the only junior in the usually freshman dominated class and as such, he always sat in the far most left desk of the middle row of the lecture hall. Funnily enough, most of the people in the room avoided Taekwoon at all costs. Sanghyuk guessed quiet and reserved equated to ‘scary’ in some of their minds. There was a running joke within the group that always occupied the desks near Taekwoon; a game of rock, paper, scissors for who out of the six of them would have to sit next to the scary upperclassman. It was completely childish and rather rude really. Sanghyuk was sure Taekwoon knew about it too which he could only imagine hurt the quiet man at least a little bit every time.

So naturally, with their newly formed friendship, Sanghyuk decided to alleviate his classmates from their terror and take the seat next to Taekwoon. Only issue was he didn’t exactly realize he decided to do such a thing until it was too late to turn back. He didn’t even think about it when he walked into the room one afternoon. He saw Taekwoon, at his usual desk, and immediately walked over to him without even thinking about it. He realized what he was doing just as he was about to sit down, but by then it was entirely too late to chicken out. The group of students that usually sat near Taekwoon watched incredulously, Taekwoon looked up at Sanghyuk with an adorably confused expression on his face.

Well… he couldn’t disappoint that face…

So, he huffed down into the seat next to Taekwoon after setting his backpack on the floor in front of him, and flipped the desk up in front of him.

“Hey,” he said in a way that he hoped was nonchalant. He smiled hoping that would add to the ‘carefree attitude’ he was trying to play out. Taekwoon only stared at him with a look Sanghyuk didn’t recognize on his face. Whatever it was, Sanghyuk really hoped he was the only recipient of such a look.

“How’s it going?” He tried again when Taekwoon didn’t say anything.

“What?” Taekwoon asked, blinking a few times and looking confused still.

“You know…” Sanghyuk laughed nervously. “How’s your day been so far?”

“Fine…? What are you doing here?” Taekwoon asked.

“I have this next lecture… Why else would I be here?”

“No no no, I mean why are you sitting here?”

“Oh,” Sanghyuk started, the words naturally came out of his mouth as he continued: “Well, you’re my friend and the only friend I have in this class so I thought I’d sit with you.”

It wasn’t exactly the truth but it was better than: “Yeah, I’m naturally drawn to you all the time because you fell in love with a ghost.” He thought that would just cause more problems that he didn’t exactly want to deal with… like ever at this point.

“We’re friends?” Taekwoon asked. Sanghyuk held back the need to gush over the cuteness.

“Well yeah, why wouldn’t we be?” Sanghyuk couldn’t really think of a reason why they wouldn’t be. They hung out at the library a lot, occasionally Taekwoon would sit and study with Sanghyuk at their coffee shop when he had time, and they were able to talk informally to each other now without feeling strange so why wouldn’t they be friends?

“I don’t know… I just didn’t know you felt that way.”

Sanghyuk didn’t know it was possible for someone to look so disappointed and so happy at the same time. Sanghyuk couldn’t understand the disappointment but the happiness part inexplicably made him happier.

“Yeah, you’re stuck with me,” Sanghyuk teased.

“Please,” Taekwoon scoffed. “You say that as if it’s a bad thing.”

Now it was Sanghyuk’s turn to be embarrassed. How couldn’t he be with a compliment like that? So, he hid it the best way he knew how.

“What was that?” He teased. “Could that actually mean… you like having me around?”

Taekwoon laughed quietly, small smile playing across his lips.

“Do I detect a hint of embarrassment?” Taekwoon continued to tease.

“What do you mean?” Sanghyuk asked, wondering how in the world Taekwoon saw through his impeccable defense mechanism.

“Did I say something that actually made you embarrassed?” He continued to poke fun.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Sanghyuk continued to deny. This never happened to him… he was always the teaser not the one getting teased! What was he supposed to do in this situation? He could feel his face heating up and he could only hope it wasn’t showing.

“You are! You’re totally blushing!”

“I shouldn’t have sat next to you.”

“Yeah, but now you’re stuck with _me_.”

“Haha, very funny.”

And even though he couldn’t remember a period of time where he was this embarrassed, he also couldn’t remember a time he was so incredibly happy to just be around one person. He also couldn’t ever remember feeling so conflicted in his own life time. He could remember, however, being super conflicted in his previous ghostly life over his feelings for the little kid turned gorgeous eighteen-year-old he apparently watched grow up and whether or not he should actually act on them… who knew he could be such a creep. But all that only made this whole mess in his head worse, because honestly what was he supposed to do with all this?

He wanted to spend more time with Taekwoon but the more time he spent with him the more memories surfaced and the more he was becoming convinced that these feelings weren’t all his own. Sure, Taekwoon was nice to talk to and conversation came really easy and Taekwoon also seemed to enjoy Sanghyuk’s company and he liked Taekwoon’s smile and he liked to hear his laugh and he liked looking at Taekwoon, he was utterly adorable no matter how much of a mess he looked and… and he was so incredibly head over heels for Taekwoon there was no coming back at this point.

To top it all off, whenever he did try to seriously think through his true feelings and not have his hazy non-memories get all in the way, more fragments of thoughts and feelings surfaced that left him even more lost than before. How was he ever going to sort this out? He didn’t want to pursue Taekwoon if he didn’t actually feel anything past friendship without the influence of those memories. Regardless of if a past life really cared for Taekwoon or not, this was his life and he didn’t want anyone else- including a past self- telling him how to live his life. He had enough of that from his parents, he didn’t need himself against him too.

And yet, whenever he was with Taekwoon, his problems and confusion just melted away completely. Everything just felt right and nothing could possibly go wrong.

He found himself actually looking forward to whenever he had to deliver a pizza to Taekwoon and his brother’s apartment because, however brief their meeting might have been, at least there was a chance he got to see that wonderful smile. He was rather ashamed to admit that he had the address memorized.

Whenever he would see Taekwoon at their shared coffee spot, he’d now always wave him over to his claimed study table while the elder waited for his drink to be made just so he could hear his voice and possibly that melodious laugh. Taekwoon would always give him a shy smile as he messed with his hair, combing it behind his left ear with his fingers as he bashfully walked over with a “I think I have some time to sit for a bit.” It legitimately made his freaking week every time that happened.

He would visit the library literally any time he could until he- again kind of creepily- learned Taekwoon’s work schedule. Then, he found himself clearing that time just so he could accompany Taekwoon for his late-night shifts. He didn’t even have a legitimate reason to show up so much anymore, but watching a sleepy Taekwoon was just too tempting of an opportunity to pass up.

And of course, his psychology lecture became his favorite lecture to attend because, despite all the playful teasing and borderline flirtatious banter, Sanghyuk found he didn’t mind being a little embarrassed if it was Taekwoon’s doing. Which was an entirely new concept for him but he quickly discovered that he could return what Taekwoon gave out tenfold by simply complimenting the man.

He honestly didn’t know what to do anymore. All the signs pointed to him being head over heels for the guy but was the other Sanghyuk dragging him down that path or was he walking willingly? He wasn’t sure what he wanted yet but that didn’t stop fate from continuing to push him along despite all his efforts to just stay still and figure everything out. He could really use some advice at this point in his confusion, but he wasn’t sure if anyone would actually believe him about all this. He hadn’t talked to Jimin in forever and calling him up just for this when he hasn’t even said ‘hi’ to him in the past year didn’t feel right. So, when the opportunity presented itself to talk to somebody actually close to the situation, he jumped on it.

“You and Taekwoonie have gotten pretty close, huh?” Jaehwan pointed out one late afternoon as the dance team was packing up from their last practice for the day.

“Yeah,” Sanghyuk said, tying his shoes and giving Jaehwan a questioning look.

“Did you know that blond really is your color?” Jaehwan then pointed out, completely off topic. Sanghyuk immediately and self-consciously ran a hand through his lightly bleached locks.

“I guess I do now,” Sanghyuk replied, wishing he hadn’t touched his hair in the very sweaty state he was in.

“And that you look rather sexy after practice, all hot and sweaty and exercised?”

Sanghyuk suddenly felt very uncomfortable. What exactly was going on right now? And he wasn’t sure if Wonsik suddenly tuning in to their conversation was a good thing or a bad thing.

“Jaehwan, what in the world are you saying?” Wonsik exclaimed, asking exactly what Sanghyuk was thinking.

“Oh, come on Wonsikkie, you can see it too, right?”

Sanghyuk looked between his two friends skeptically. His uncomfortableness only got worse as Wonsik looked him up and down with a scrutinizing gaze.

“Well after hearing Taekwoon-hyung gush about him for hours on end, it’s hard not to see that he’s the real deal,” Wonsik said finally.

Jaehwan hit Wonsik on the shoulder, giving him a look that clearly said Wonsik shouldn’t have said what he just did. This whole exchange reminded Sanghyuk of something… a conversation with Taekwoon’s entire family, Jaehwan wishing he had a ‘hot ghost in love with him’. This just raised more questions since Sanghyuk was pretty sure he never met Jaehwan and Taekwoon’s parents and if he had, he’d certainly never forget meeting his dancing idol Cha Hakyeon.

“Hold on a minute,” Sanghyuk said, interrupting Jaehwan and Wonsik’s silent conversation. “What are you guys talking about?”

The couple looked at each other, seeming to come to a silent understanding; must’ve been a long-standing relationship thing. Jaehwan sighed before then turning to Sanghyuk once more.

“Do you like Taekwoon?” He asked, very blunt and not dancing around the subject at all.

“Yeah of course, he’s pretty cool… I like having him as a friend.”

“No no, I mean do you _like_ him?”

Sanghyuk almost spit out the water he had taken a swig of in his surprise at Jaehwan’s forwardness.

“W-what?”

“Oh, don’t give me that, I’ve seen the way you look at my brother.”

“Why did you even ask me if you were going to assume I liked him anyway?” Sanghyuk asked, feeling a bit annoyed. It wasn’t really Jaehwan’s fault… this was just a bit of a touchy subject lately. The frustration of actually figuring out the answer to that question was projected on to his friends, he felt guilty almost immediately after he finished snapping at Jaehwan.

“Am I wrong?” Jaehwan asked, completely ignoring the bitterness in Sanghyuk’s question.

“I… I don’t know,” Sanghyuk said, holding his face in his hands. Jaehwan immediately cooed after him, rubbing at his back soothingly.

“Hey, it’ll be okay, Wonsikkie and I are always here.”

Now that he thought about it a little more… it was almost just as natural being Wonsik and Jaehwan’s friend as it was being around Taekwoon. He had felt an instant connection with them, as well. And apparently, as he just recently discovered, he had fuzzy memories of them too. So… that had to mean they knew all about his ghostly other self.

“Can I…” He started carefully. “Can I talk to you guys about something?”

He really wasn’t sure what would happen if he brought this all out into the open, but he was so lost dealing with everything by himself. He knew there was a chance everything he said here would make it back to Taekwoon and that would probably cause even more issues but he was all out of options on his end, short of actually talking to Taekwoon… which would create just as many problems and he’d probably be an emotional wreck the entire time.

“Yeah, of course,” Jaehwan said.

“Anything.” Wonsik agreed.

So, taking a deep breath, Sanghyuk shakily explained everything. From suddenly acquiring memories that weren’t his own two years ago, to what his friend Jimin had told him a year ago, to meeting Taekwoon for the first time. He explained his confusion and frustration. How the memories are becoming more vivid with him almost being able to recall full moments that he had never experienced at will now. And most of all, how he didn’t want all his relationships in life to be formed simply because a past-life wants to live out _his_ life.

“I must sound completely insane,” Sanghyuk laughed bitterly as he finished. Jaehwan and Wonsik didn’t say anything for a moment.

“It would sound crazy,” Jaehwan started.

“If we hadn’t met the other you…” Wonsik finished.

“Yeah,” Sanghyuk said. “I knew that. I remember that. You guys believed Taekwoon-hyung first when your parents didn’t.”

“You really do remember everything, then,” Wonsik said, sounding a little sad.

Jaehwan took a different approach, suddenly and very sharply hitting Sanghyuk upside the head.

“Do you remember never apologizing for haunting my toothbrush, you jerk!?” He shouted, sounding genuinely and very upset.

“Ow!” Sanghyuk exclaimed. “I’m not the same person! Sure, I may look like him and share everything else including his memories but I’m my own person! That’s kind of the whole reason I asked for your help!” He snapped out.

“Yeah, we understand,” Wonsik said. “His toothbrush is a bit of a touchy subject.”

“I’m sorry,” Jaehwan agreed. “That was insensitive of me.”

“It’s all right… I just don’t want my life dictated by the ghost’s memories…” Sanghyuk said. “And I really don’t want to lead Taekwoon-hyung on to only decide that the only reason I liked him that way was because of those memories.”

The couple nodded in understanding, both considering what Sanghyuk was saying.

“He’s crazy about you, you know… and before you even ask, he hasn’t once brought up the other you since the first time he met you… it’s been this you…” Jaehwan started carefully.

“Really?”

“Why would I lie to you about this? So, let me ask you this… Without thinking about ghost-hyuk’s memories, how has your experience with Taekwoon been? Don’t think, just say it.”

“Wonderful,” Sanghyuk whispered without a second of hesitation. “I love spending time with him.”

“And are you against the idea, at all, about pursuing a relationship with Taekwoon-hyung?” Wonsik added.

“Definitely not…” Again, there wasn’t a second of hesitation.

“Then what’s the issue?”

A very good point…

He hadn’t really considered what Taekwoon was going through. He felt rather selfish for never even considering the other side of this mess. The other Sanghyuk had decided to move on which must have really taken its toll on the other male. While Sanghyuk suffered the acquisition of new memories, Taekwoon was mourning their loss. Seeing what looked like his ‘Hyuk’ must’ve been quite the shock for him, possibly just as confusing and frustrating as what Sanghyuk was going through. This revelation also came with new insecurities. Since Jaehwan and Wonsik affirmed that his past-self looked exactly as he does now- they even devised an elaborate plot to get him to die his hair blond like the ghost’s- could Taekwoon only be interested in him because he met Sanghyuk’s past-life’s ghost? And if that were the case, would Taekwoon not want to continue hanging around him when he realized the two Hyuks were different people?

Then he remembered what else Jaehwan and Wonsik had told him about Taekwoon.

“He’s crazy about you.”

“He talks about you… the real you all the time.”

“He hasn’t brought up the other Hyuk since he first met you…”

“I haven’t seen him this happy in a long time.”

Maybe he could give this a shot. Maybe he could put aside everything he’s worried about for months. Maybe he could make this work. Because after all, he was happiest when he was with Taekwoon. And, if Taekwoon’s brothers were credible source, he was just as head over heels for him.

First thing was first, though, he needed to verify for himself that Taekwoon actually was interested in him before he made any moves.

His chance came one afternoon as he was leaving the dance studios to go shower and get to his classes for the day. He was utterly exhausted, sore all over the place, and he really wanted to take a nap. These past few days had been killer as the team was gearing up for its annual showcase before the actual competitions started. He knew all these practices were necessary to make sure everyone was ready but he really wished he didn’t have so many of them that took up all his free time. It’d be a while since he got to see Taekwoon; he really hoped that didn’t hurt his chances with the man.

He walked down the hallways of the fine arts department’s building, lugging his bag full of equipment and casually looking inside the various rooms he went by. It was always kind of interesting to see the various activities that were going on in the building. He passed by a couple lectures where the professor was animatedly acting for his class, an art room full of people drawing a nude model, there were a couple people still practicing dance in the smaller studios; he waved at the people he recognized.

Most notably, however, came as he passed by a small black box auditorium. He couldn’t see anyone in the room, but what he heard blew him away. He stepped closer just to get a clearer sound. A beautiful voice, rather high up there for what Sanghyuk knew to be a male singing. He knew that voice; he’d recognize that voice anywhere; it made him want to just melt it was so gorgeous. The lyrics were nothing that he recognized so the singer must have written it himself, which honestly didn’t surprise Sanghyuk since the lyrics were so soft and meaningful and fit the singer’s personality so well.

Sanghyuk stepped into the room, knowing full well this was the moment where he’d determine what his real feelings were. He had to. Not knowing was driving him absolutely insane. All the doubts and threats of rejection were eating him alive. He had to get this settled and it was now or never.

He leaned against the wall inside the auditorium, completely entranced by the melody of the song. It’s singer, none other than Taekwoon, just as Sanghyuk had thought. He faced away form Sanghyuk as he sang towards the small set of bleachers, probably imagining he was in front of an audience. Sanghyuk could imagine what the other looked like as he sang. Eyes closed, hands moving to emphasize parts of the song, a look of pure happiness on his face as he sang the love-filled lyrics.

From the memories Sanghyuk now could almost clearly see, there were only a few closely guarded memories that he occasionally got fragments of. Those probably meant the most to the ghost and for whatever reason he didn’t want to share them. But from what he could actually remember, Taekwoon had really improved in the past two years. He’d grown a lot more confident, singing his heart out for his imaginary audience. His voice was so strong, Sanghyuk couldn’t help but listen. If he had been in the audience, he’d for sure be on the edge of his seat, hanging on to every beautifully sung word. He didn’t even hesitate when Taekwoon finished his song after one last wonderful high note, Sanghyuk clapped, loud and proud, finally alerting Taekwoon of his presence.

The other male jumped a bit, clearly startled, and whipped around looking all over for his unknown audience. Sanghyuk pushed himself off the wall he leaned against, walking towards Taekwoon as his eyes landed on the younger of the two. He visibly deflated but still blushed a little in recognition.

“You nearly gave me a heart attack,” Taekwoon whispered, as if that’s as loud as his voice would let him go. That worried Sanghyuk a bit…

“Sorry,” Sanghyuk immediately apologized. “I didn’t mean to… I just felt like I had to applaud after a performance like that, you know?”

“How long were you standing there?” Taekwoon said, blushing even harder if that was even possible. He was still whispering though.

“Long enough to know you’re absolutely amazing,” Sanghyuk complimented, walking around Taekwoon to set his heavy equipment bag on the floor and take a seat in one of the chairs; he was too exhausted to stand for much longer.

Taekwoon dug his foot into the ground a couple times, looking very happy with the praise.

“Do you really think so?”

“Of course,” Sanghyuk said with a smile he hoped was bright instead of just tired. “You’re really great, hyung.”

“Thank you,” Taekwoon whispered.

“Why are you whispering?” Sanghyuk teased, bringing his voice down to a whisper to help get his point across. Taekwoon looked away from Sanghyuk and wouldn’t look at him again. Sanghyuk recalled something from his past-life; a nasty little habit that Taekwoon had always had. He’d practice over and over again until he felt he did it perfectly, pushing himself way past his limits to the point where it was dangerous. That had to be the reason Taekwoon was whispering.

“Hyung…” Sanghyuk said, letting his disappointment show through. “How long have you been practicing?”

“A couple weeks on that song, I have to present it to the board tomorrow,” Taekwoon answered.

“You know that’s not what I meant.”

Taekwoon didn’t say anything to that but that was all the response Sanghyuk needed.

“Hyung, you can’t do this to yourself.”

“Oh? And you’re one to talk!” Taekwoon shot right back. Though, it would’ve been more threatening if his voice wasn’t so hoarse when he spoke above a whisper.

“What are you talking about?”

“Surely you must know how tired you look after dancing in front of mirrors for hours,” Taekwoon continued.

“Hey,” Sanghyuk laughed, standing up suddenly to meet Taekwoon’s challenge. “This isn’t about me! You can barely talk, your voice is so hoarse.”

“And you can barely stand, your legs are so sore.”

Sanghyuk laughed, sitting back down because Taekwoon was right on one account. But he wasn’t going to let the elder know that.

“I only look this way because I just got out of practice and I’m tired because of it, not because I’m pushing myself too hard.”

Taekwoon immediately scoffed at that.

“Yeah okay, like I’ll believe that. My brothers dance with you and they always tell me how hard you work compared to everyone else.”

“Damn traitors,” Sanghyuk mumbled. “When did this become about me? I was only worried about you…”

“And I’m worried about you,” Taekwoon whispered back; though, Sanghyuk was sure it was out of embarrassment this time.

“Well, I am completely fine,” Sanghyuk said even though that was a little far from the truth.

“All right, if you’re so “fine” why don’t you dance for me? Right now.”

“What?” Sanghyuk wasn’t sure where Taekwoon was going with this.

“You got to see me perform, I think it’s only fair I get to see you now as well,” Taekwoon said, crossing his arms and looking way too proud of himself.

“You could see me perform during the showcase,” Sanghyuk shot right back.

“Yeah, but I’d be there anyway on account of my brothers. I want to see just you prove that you’re “fine” enough to dance. Right now.”

Sanghyuk hated that Taekwoon put air quotes around the word ‘fine’ every time.

“All right then,” Sanghyuk said, clapping his hands together and jumping up like his body didn’t immediately scream for him to sit back down again “I’ll do it.”

Taekwoon gave him a surprised look but moved to sit where Sanghyuk had been before regardless.

Sanghyuk walked over to the sound system, plugging his phone in to the auditorium’s speakers and selecting a song. It was his solo song for their upcoming competitions. He’d spent months, countless hours perfecting this choreography. He hoped he could pull it off in the absolutely exhausted state he was in; so maybe he had been pushing himself a little too hard. But regardless, after seeing Taekwoon’s stunning performance, he really wanted to show off a bit. Have Taekwoon look at him in an awestruck silence as he watched him; impress the man.

He felt a bit light-headed as he moved to stand in the middle of the dance floor but he pushed past it. He was too stubborn to back away now.

When the first verse of the song started up, so did Sanghyuk’s dancing. It was a lot more contemporary than anything he had done before, but he was really proud of it. The instructor that choreographed the dance for him really though he could go far with this one. He hadn’t danced it for anyone besides his choreographer and he was actually really glad that the first person who saw it was Taekwoon.

So, he danced his heart out, like he didn’t feel like he was falling apart and completely dizzy. He flowed with the lyrics when the dance called for it or was sharp and on the beat during other moments. When he caught a glimpse of Taekwoon watching him, he was overjoyed to see him watching the performance intently. Everything was going really well.

And then the chorus hit.

It was almost too perfect; how well his downfall matched up with the song. He was supposed to do a special jump to transition from the first half of the dance to the second. Leaping into the air was easy enough, landing, however, was the issue. His legs turned to jelly as his feet hit the floor. He collapsed to the ground in a fit of coughs. The room was spinning; it was hard to breathe and he couldn’t stop coughing. He was vaguely aware of the music stopping and the sound of Taekwoon rushing to his side as he shakily moved to his hands and knees, still coughing his lungs out.

“Are you okay?” Taekwoon asked, worry clear in his voice as he lightly patted Sanghyuk’s back. Sanghyuk waited for his coughs to die down a little before responding.

“Yeah,” he said, clearing his now very sore throat and sitting back on his knees.

“Are you sure?” Taekwoon asked again, clearly not convinced. Neither was Sanghyuk if he were being honest, but something like this had happened before. He just hadn’t seen it coming.

“Yeah, I’m sure,” Sanghyuk assured again, coughing a couple more times.

“You should have told me you were too drained to dance, you stubborn jerk,” Taekwoon scolded, sounding actually very angry.

“I’m sorry, Hyung. And I’m sorry for worrying you, truly, but this didn’t happen because I was tired, though it probably didn’t help. This hasn’t happened in such a long time, I forgot it actually could.”

“What do you mean? Are you sick or something?” Taekwoon asked, sounding even more worried than before if that were possible. For whatever reason, a new memory flashed through Sanghyuk’s mind. It was of him explaining to Taekwoon how he had died… no wonder Taekwoon was suddenly so worried.

“Well, when I was sixteen, I got sick. No one thought much of it at first because for the longest time it felt and looked like nothing more than a common cold.

“But it wasn’t just a common cold obviously because it just wouldn’t go away and it progressively got worse over a long period of time and I had such a terrible cough. But one night, I woke up feeling so awful that I couldn’t even walk.”

Taekwoon listened to his story with rapt attention. Sanghyuk wondered if he was also able to draw connections between the two Hyuks as he was. Now that he thought about it, the night he woke up feeling like death was the same night the memories started appearing. He wondered if they had some sort of influence over why he lived through his illness whereas the other Hyuk hadn’t; the reason he felt so compelled to seek medical help that night, right before it would’ve been too late for him.

“I quite literally crawled to my parents’ bedroom and begged them to take me to the emergency room. Once I was stabilized, a doctor told me that I had one of the worst cases of pneumonia they had ever received at that hospital, they couldn’t understand how it could’ve been misdiagnosed so many times and that if I had come in even a day later, it would’ve been too late to save me.”

Taekwoon looked at him with a completely stunned expression, almost like he couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“I got better obviously,” Sanghyuk continued. “But every now and again, I still break down into coughing fits like that one. The doctors have told me that’ll probably never go away because of how bad I got.”

“Oh my god,” Taekwoon whispered, still shocked. “So you could’ve… you actually could’ve…”

Instead of finishing his thought, Taekwoon flung himself at Sanghyuk. Grabbing on and holding him tightly in a hug. Sanghyuk was surprised at first, but easily returned the hug after a moment. It was a little awkward considering they were both kneeling on the ground but Sanghyuk couldn’t find it in him to care. This was probably the best hug he’d ever received. It felt so natural and comforting, his worries seemed miles away in this moment.

“Died?” Sanghyuk said, deciding to finish Taekwoon’s sentence. “Yeah, but I didn’t, see? I’m right here, alive and relatively well. No need to worry, yeah?”

Taekwoon pulled away a little to look Sanghyuk in the eye, but stayed in his arms. He looked close to tears but Sanghyuk didn’t think he had seen a happier expression on the man’s face.

“I know you are,” Taekwoon started, voice shaky with unshed tears. “I can hear your heartbeat.”

Sanghyuk felt like he could melt at those words and that smile. The absolutely gorgeous smile that Taekwoon wore was mesmerizing. White teeth on full display and eyes curving into beautiful crescents. Sanghyuk didn’t think it was possible to find someone this beautiful. 

He hadn’t realized how close they were until this moment; he could see every little detail of the man’s face. From the beauty mark under his right eye to his wonderfully plush lips that Sanghyuk was suddenly dying to kiss.

So he did.

He’d always been a rather impulsive guy anyway.

The moment their lips met, Sanghyuk decided he didn’t care about whether or not his feelings for Taekwoon were his own or the influence of someone else’s. He adored this man and if kissing him always felt this _right,_ he didn’t want to kiss anyone else ever again.

Taekwoon must’ve had the same thought process because he responded to the kiss immediately. Lips falling easily in sync with the slow rhythm that felt all too familiar. A hundred different kisses flashed through his mind shared with Taekwoon in a past life, but for once, the acquisition of new memories didn’t bother him. As long as he could be with Taekwoon in this life, he didn’t care.

When they pulled away, Taekwoon’s eyes lingered shut for a few moments more before he sighed happily. His eyes fluttered open and he smiled at Sanghyuk.

“Was that…?” Sanghyuk started, feeling like he should apologize for kissing him without asking for permission first. Even though they both clearly enjoyed what happened.

“Okay? Yeah definitely,” Taekwoon affirmed, nodding his head enthusiastically.

“Okay,” Sanghyuk returned the smile.

“So… My brothers are throwing a party after your guys’ showcase on Friday… You’d probably be invited anyway. But do you want to come…. With me?”

“You mean like as a date?” Sanghyuk asked just to make sure they were both on the same page. He’d never been much for parties, hadn’t attended a single one all year but if Taekwoon was invited him to one, then he’d gladly go. 

“Yeah,” Taekwoon nodded again, smile somehow becoming brighter. “Yeah, exactly like that.”

“Then, yeah!” Sanghyuk agreed without even a second of hesitation. “Yeah, I’ll be there.”

Sanghyuk honestly couldn’t be happier. Well, he probably could be because for the past couple months he’d been thinking he couldn’t be happier and then proving himself wrong the next time he saw Taekwoon. He just couldn’t believe he was actually going on a date with the man he’d not been able to stop thinking about for two whole years. And for once, that thought didn’t leave him hopelessly confused or agonizingly frustrated; he just felt happy.

The only slight issue was the whole reincarnation thing. He felt like at this point, he had to tell Taekwoon that he remembers basically everything from his soul’s ghostly adventures…

He figured that he’d tell Taekwoon at the party if the moment presented itself. He was a little worried that revealing such information would scare the other male away potentially but he felt like he had to. It’d feel weird if they never talked about the elephant in the room. Taekwoon would probably never be the first one to bring it up since if Sanghyuk didn’t actually remember anything, he’d sound completely crazy. But if Sanghyuk brought it up, then Taekwoon might feel more comfortable talking about it. He just really didn’t want to scare the other man away; not when he was this far gone for him.

But he had to do it and he settled on doing it at the party. So he put it out of his mind as best he could so he could get through the week. He had to prepare the showcase that the party would be celebrating anyway.

The week went by in a flash of long practices and late nights trying to keep up with his school assignments. When the showcase came around it, thankfully, went off without a hitch. He saw Taekwoon in the audience while he was on stage and that gave him the last bit of motivation he needed to dance his heart out through the soreness. He was very happy that he didn’t break down coughing again during his solo performance this time; he received a standing ovation from the audience; which was started by none other than Taekwoon.

After the showcase ended, Taekwoon approached Sanghyuk backstage with an offering of beautiful roses.

“My parents are here so they got Wonsik flowers for his performance… I didn’t know if anyone was here for you though, so I thought I’d give you flowers,” Taekwoon said when Sanghyuk only stared at him with a surprised expression.

“Thank you,” Sanghyuk said, hoping he wasn’t blushing as he accepted the flowers. “You didn’t have to…”

“But I wanted to because such a great dancer deserves to get recognized,” Taekwoon said.

“You’re the literal best.” He leaned in and kissed Taekwoon’s cheek, reveling in the little blush and the shy posture Taekwoon immediately took on in the aftermath.

He was called away by his instructors for some overall critiques so he waved goodbye to Taekwoon, who surprised him by kissing him chastely on the lips in his own goodbye and promising to talk more at the party later that night. Sanghyuk wasn’t even sure what to call their relationship yet but he definitely wanted it to continue on this way; everything just felt so right.

He went back to his dorm after everything was figured out after the showcase, feeling super excited yet completely nervous. He spent way more time than he’d like to admit trying to find the right outfit.

When he finally arrived at Taekwoon and his brothers’ apartment, it was already hopping with tons of people. He recognized some of them from the dance team but he assumed a lot of them were people that had followed the sound of heavy bass and blaring music to the party.

It was crowded in the small apartment but not so much so where Sanghyuk found himself unable to navigate through everyone. He made his way to the kitchen first in search of something to drink. He wouldn’t actually drink alcohol; he needed to be clear headed for what he wanted to talk about with Taekwoon. Plus, he actually wanted to remember everything about this night if all went well… If it didn’t… well, that’s when he’d start actually drinking. But above all else, he just didn’t want to look like he totally didn’t belong in this scene because that’s what he totally felt like.

He maneuvered his way through the kitchen, grabbing a random soda and pouring it into a cup. Sanghyuk couldn’t figure out who had bought so much alcohol for this party because as far as he knew, Taekwoon was twenty but would never agree to buy his underage brothers alcohol for a party. Must’ve been some of the older students from the dance team.

He was stopped by numerous members from the team as he tried to causally walk around the apartment in search of Taekwoon. They were all super excited to see that he actually showed up to one of their parties… they were all also super drunk. He found Jaehwan and Wonsik but they were super engrossed in each other, making out on the couch, so he didn’t want to invade that little bubble. So, for the time being, until he found Taekwoon through all the people, he decided to hang around a group of his dance buddies. He wasn’t exactly close with them but watching a bunch of drunk idiots try to hold a conversation was a lot more entertaining than wandering around the apartment feeling like a lost idiot.

The lights were dimmed throughout the complex and music was blasting from several scattered speakers all around the living room. People were everywhere; sitting, standing and talking, dancing, or in a darker corner of the place doing more explicit things. Sanghyuk avoided those corners as he jumped around from conversation to conversation.

After about thirty minutes of meandering, he finally spotted the whole reason he came to this party in the first place.

Taekwoon sat in a chair across the room, looking rather bored with his surroundings. He had a drink in hand, sipping from it on occasion as he looked from person to person. He looked utterly gorgeous- he always did but now Sanghyuk actually allowed himself to admire the man. He wore a deep blue button-up that had a lovely sheen in the dim lighting, and very tight skinny jeans. His hair was carefully styled so it wasn’t just hanging in his eyes as it usually was.

As he took another drink from his cup, his eyes met Sanghyuk’s across the crowded room. Sanghyuk could make out a smile hidden behind his cup and he couldn’t look away. He excused himself from his current conversation and made his way over to Taekwoon.

“Hey,” he greeted upon getting close enough. “What’s a guy like you doing in a place like this?” He joked.

Taekwoon laughed.

“Please, a guy like me is the only reason a guy like you comes to a place like this.”

“You’ve gotten better at this whole joke thing.”

“I’ve been practicing,” Taekwoon smiled, taking a sip from his cup. “Should you be drinking?”

He gestured to Sanghyuk’s cup.

“Oh this?” He knew Taekwoon would point that out. “It’s just coke.”

“Oh I see, didn’t want people to think you were a nerd?” Taekwoon teased.

“Haha very funny,” Sanghyuk laughed, because it was true what Taekwoon had said. “I could just leave,” he continued, pointing over his shoulder.

“No,” Taekwoon whined, standing up, setting his cup down, and grabbing Sanghyuk’s arm. “Don’t go.”

“How much have you had to drink?” Sanghyuk asked. Taekwoon was acting a lot clingier than he ever had before.

“None, it’s just soda,” Taekwoon laughed, leaning in close. “Because I’m a nerd too.”

“Oh, I know,” Sanghyuk laughed, deciding he rather liked clingy Taekwoon. He grabbed onto his waist lightly and pulled him a little closer. “So, you wanna dance?”

“A little bold, aren’t we?” Taekwoon teased.

“Again, I could just leave…”

“You’d have to let go of me first.”

“Do you want me to?”

Taekwoon reached up and wrapped his arms around Sanghyuk’s neck before saying:

“No, definitely not.”

“Then will you dance with me? Surely the son of Cha Hakyeon and Lee Hongbin is a great dancer.”

“I may know a few things.”

So Taekwoon led Sanghyuk out onto the dance floor, disengaging from his arms only for the time it took to get there.

It had all started off innocent enough. They were a reasonable distance apart for a public place and nothing was very explicit, unlike all the drunk couples around them. Taekwoon really was a good dancer. Sanghyuk sometimes had to remind himself to keep dancing and not just stand there and stupidly stare at Taekwoon in the middle of the designated dance floor.

But as the songs went by and they both became more comfortable with the fact they were indeed on a date, their dancing changed accordingly. Feeding off the sexual tension that had been building since they started talking earlier in the evening, it wasn’t long before the two were pressed close to each other, bodies moving in sync, sharing each other’s breath. It was the first time he had ever danced dirty with someone but Sanghyuk found it really wasn’t hard. Taekwoon’s hips moved in such a sinful way, it drove him absolutely insane. And if the way Taekwoon would smirk at him after a particularly delicious move was anything to go by, the elder knew exactly what he was doing to him.

When Sanghyuk couldn’t take it any longer, he captured Taekwoon’s lips in an utterly bruising kiss. If he was moving too fast for their newly blooming relationship, Taekwoon didn’t stop him.

Instead, he was me with equal enthusiasm. They clumsily made their way off the dance floor to find a secluded part of the room to continue their kissing. It didn’t take long before Taekwoon was being pushed up against a wall with Sanghyuk easily enveloping him with his larger frame.

“I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wanted you to do this to me,” Taekwoon admitted in between heated kisses.

“You mean throw you up against a wall?” Sanghyuk asked, moving to kiss at Taekwoon’s neck.

“F-fuck,” Taekwoon sighed before saying: “Yeah, exactly.”

Sanghyuk laughed, voice an octave lower than it normally was. Taekwoon shivered under his lips.

“I should’ve done it sooner then.” Sanghyuk emphasized his point by pressing his thigh between Taekwoon’s legs up a little higher, causing a gorgeous whine to fall from the other man’s lips. “God, I want you so bad.”

Something flashed in Taekwoon’s eyes, a desire so pure Sanghyuk didn’t think it could get much better than this. But suddenly, Taekwoon was pushing Sanghyuk off of him. He worried briefly that maybe he had overstepped some boundaries, but that was quickly put to rest as Taekwoon grabbed his hand and led him away from the living room and down a small hallway. He opened a door, pulling Sanghyuk into the dark room, shutting and locking it once they were both inside what Sanghyuk assumed to be Taekwoon’s bedroom.

Taekwoon continued to push him backwards into the room.

“Where are we going?” Sanghyuk asked, a playful lilt to his voice.

“Where do you think?” Taekwoon answered, hand firmly splayed on Sanghyuk’s chest, pushing him further into the room. The back of Sanghyuk’s legs hit what he guessed was a bed behind him. He could just make out a smirk on Taekwoon’s face as he fell backwards, landing on the bed behind him. Sanghyuk pulled himself further onto the bed for convenience as Taekwoon crawled on top of him.

“Rather bold, aren’t you?” Sanghyuk teased, trying to hold back whatever noises might escape his mouth as Taekwoon dragged his lips across his skin, and moved his hips in purposefully slow circles.

“Nervous?” Taekwoon teased, biting a spot under Sanghyuk’s ear. Sanghyuk let out a groan of pleasure despite himself.

“Never,” Sanghyuk met the challenge head on, sitting up a little so Taekwoon could pull his shirt up over his head. He looked down at him with a look of adoration on his face. Sanghyuk would’ve felt uncomfortable being stared at in such a way, but he found he didn’t much mind it if it was Taekwoon. That seemed to be the case for a lot of things lately.

Taekwoon kissed him once more and he returned it easily. It was fast, and needy, and passionate, and Sanghyuk couldn’t get enough. After a moment of kissing, he forced his tongue into the other man’s mouth, deepening their kiss and earning a surprised moan for his efforts. Taekwoon resumed his slow grinding while their tongues tangled between their open mouths. Sanghyuk’s hands found their way to Taekwoon’s hips, trying to get the man to go just a bit faster; the slow pace just had to be killing him as well. But Taekwoon wouldn’t budge. So Sanghyuk flipped their positions.

“Listen here you little tease,” Sanghyuk whispered into Taekwoon’s ear, taking pleasure in the shivers that ran through the body under his, and the bitten back whine that still escaped past those beautiful lips. Sanghyuk sat up, moving to straddle Taekwoon’s legs and admire the view. His eyes had adjusted to the darkness so he could fully admire the beautiful man below him.

His skin was flushed a lovely red that he could see even in the darkness. His lips a little swollen from their constant and very passionate lip lock and parted slightly as he took deep, panting breaths; his eyes, half-lidded in pleasure as he looked up at Sanghyuk in anticipation; his hair, fanning out on the comforter behind him in a mess that Sanghyuk just wanted to run his fingers through desperately.

But before he could even hope to do such a thing, a pang of pain went through his head. A sharp one, accompanied with black clouding his vision. He grabbed at his forehead, suddenly feeling very dizzy. A million different memories flashed through his mind; some were of things he’d already seen before and others were completely new. Most prominently were of the ones where Taekwoon would tell him that he loved him. A thousand different times, in a thousand different situations. Another new thing he got was of all the times they had been in a situation exactly like the one they were in now, exploring a more mature side of their relationship.

Taekwoon sat up, looking extremely worried and bringing Sanghyuk back to the present.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, wiping at Sanghyuk’s tear-stained cheeks; he hadn’t even realized he started crying. “W-we don’t have to do this if you’re not comfortable…”

Taekwoon immediately started, but Sanghyuk shook his head to quickly dispel those thoughts.

“No, that’s not it.” Sanghyuk took a deep breath; it was now or never. “I just… remembered something.”

Taekwoon looked at him even more confused than before.

“Okay…?”

“I remembered something… from when you met me before coming here… when part of me, was a ghost.”

Taekwoon’s eyebrows shot up his forehead, his mouth fell open to form an ‘o’ in surprise.

“Does this mean… you actually do…”

“Remember you? Yeah,” Sanghyuk admitted. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you for the past two years.”

He leaned his head forward, resting his forehead against Taekwoon’s, closing his eyes contently. Arms snaked their way around his waist as Taekwoon embraced him; Sanghyuk returned it by wrapping his arms loosely around the other’s neck. He was suddenly reminded of their position, with him still straddling Taekwoon’s thighs, but he couldn’t find it in him to move and Taekwoon didn’t look to be in any rush to change the situation either so he stayed put.

“How is this happening?” Taekwoon whispered, sounding completely bewildered.

“The other part of me that you met loved you so god damn much, his memories of you carried over to me…”

It was Taekwoon’s turn to shed a couple tears out of happiness at such a statement, but then his expression turned to that of worry once more.

“But does that mean… the only reason you started talking to me was because of those memories?”

“I thought that at first as well, but looking at you now, being with you now… I honestly can’t think of anywhere I’d rather be,” Sanghyuk admitted, looking down into Taekwoon’s eyes.

“I love you,” Taekwoon admitted as well. “And I mean, this you.”

Sanghyuk laughed, feeling nothing but pure happiness at those words.

“I told you I’d find you again, didn’t I?” Sanghyuk said. Taekwoon smiled up at him in response, nodding happily before pulling him even closer into a heartfelt hug. “I love you too,” Sanghyuk whispered into his hair.

He didn’t think he could get any happier than he had been earlier that week, but yet again, here he was proving himself wrong. He could stand to be wrong, though, as long as it meant being with Taekwoon for the rest of his actual life. He loved the man in his arms, and if it was only because a past-life had fallen in love with that same man then oh well. He was never happier than when he was with Taekwoon; so, he supposed he had those memories to thank for all this in the first place.

And for once in both his lives, the how, why, or when of everything, didn’t matter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took me way too long to write and even longer to actually start writing it. But as promised, the long awaited sequel has arrived! I hope it lives up to the first chapter and your expectations on what a sequel would contain! 
> 
> With this done, I'll be starting on my chaptered fic again so if you follow that, you shouldn't have to wait too much longer for the next chapter. If you don't... give it a try! Especially if you like mageAUs or are a fan of any of the Fate anime series. I'm really proud of it. And though my update schedule is kind of whack at the moment, I'm going to try and finish it this summer. Here's hoping ^_^
> 
> As always, though, thanks for reading! 
> 
> All comments appreciated!

**Author's Note:**

> This has the potential for a sequel... if enough people are interested that is. 
> 
> All comments are appreciated. Thanks for reading!


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